Bensko Bitz

Bensko Holiday Tips as Seen on KCAL 9 Los Angeles

2010-12-01T08:57:00.000-08:00

Tips & Apps for Perfect Holiday Pics on KCAL 9

2010-11-29T11:47:00.000-08:00

Mic's Six Tips for Perfect Holiday Pics on KCAL 9!

November 30th at 2:30pm!

1. Busy makes you Dizzy. Stay away from busy prints. Your clothes do not need to match perfectly so relax! The sure bet is blue jeans and white shirts or blue jeans and black shirts, but otherwise don't get too specific in a color scheme. Just make sure your colors are in the same vein. Natural colors are best such as earth tones or soft blues, evergreen, tans. Just make sure there isn't one shirt that stands out such as a bright red shirt among all neutral tones, etc.

Notice the tones all flow, and set a mood which is peaceful...

2. Don't Pout It's Dinner Out! Make it a fun night out, not just a photo session! There's nothing wrong with promising a trip to see Santa at the mall afterward, or a visit to their favorite restaurant!

3. Smile at the Dial! Your camera is smarter than you think... Those little icons on your camera dial are there for a reason so use them! They actually work!

If you don't have the silhouette icon, then use your Auto Mode if you are not used to Manual

4. Attach the Flash. Turn off your on-camera flash to avoid harsh light and use an attachable flash. Learn how to "bounce the light" off a large light colored surface whether it be the ceiling or a wall. Most heads swivel and offer a beautiful glowing light if outdoor photography is not an option! My App pick for this tip is the "Light Meter"

Say hello to my leetle friend...

5. Invade the Shade. You'd be surprised how beautiful natural light can be right in the shade. Look for an even light, not one spackled with shadows. Some unexpectedly beautiful light can be found under a tree near the trunk, or in your front doorway, even in a dingy garage. Not every location needs to be beautiful, sometimes the beauty comes simply from the light itself.


Great light can be found in your own doorway!

6. The Golden 40. When shooting outside or at the beach, shoot 20min prior to sunset and 20 min after! Download the "Sunrise Sunset" app to your iPhone and you can find out exactly when the sun sets at any beach in the world! *Check out our TinyPrints Store Front for card ideas!

I hope these pointers help out a little bit. Ultimately the goal is to have HAPPY faces shining from your card, so don't forget the number one thing to keep in mind is ENJOY THE PROCESS! Leave yourself plenty of time so as not to rush anything, allow the crankiest elf to select their own outfit and work your color scheme around that, and bring lollipops! Maybe even work the lollipop into the photo! Get the big fun swirly kind and let the kids (or grown ups) rock it! It's the season of JOY, so keep reminding yourself...the process of capturing the image is just as meaningful as the image itself so make it fun for all involved and you just might be the saint of their holiday.
One last thought, please don't forget your favorite charities this holiday season. My two favorites are a part of my family now: The Iraq Star Foundation, Providing free reconstructive surgery to our troops returning from Iraq and Afghanistan. As well as The Tempered Steel Organization, Uniting wounded soldiers and the public through dialogue.

Both support the troops and are helping to bring peace, hope, love and joy to many military personnel this holiday season.
Happy Holidays to ALL!

Mic's App Picks for Better Pics!

Portrait Photography 101

Kid Friendly Restaurants

Photo Trainer

Light Meter

Camera Icons Demystified

2010-11-29T10:44:00.000-08:00

What Are All Those Camera Icons?

The tiny symbols on your digital camera's dial represent a wealth of features and functions.Dave Johnson

Illustration by Diego Aguirre

It's no surprise that Windows applications are filled with arcane icons, buttons, and menu options. But the dizzying array of esoteric symbols on digital cameras makes deciphering your computer icons seem like child's play. That's because digital cameras pack dozens of features into a miniature gadget. Complex concepts must be translated into single icons, such as an eyeball-shaped one that signifies automatic red-eye reduction. Here's a crib sheet for figuring out the meaning of the most common icons adorning your camera's settings dial.

A Key to Camera Icons: Making Sense of the Symbols

Illustration by Diego Aguirre

Auto Mode: When you want to take snapshots without worrying about the mechanics of photography, leave this setting on Auto. This mode sets all exposure levels automatically, and it usually locks you out of making any minor adjustments manually.

Illustration by Diego Aguirre

Manual Mode: This mode gives you total control. You use buttons on the camera's body to set both shutter speed and aperture size. Remember, though, that you're working without a safety net--the camera won't protect you from under- or overexposure.

Illustration by Diego Aguirre

Aperture Mode: When you set the size of the aperture, your camera automatically provides the right shutter speed to deliver a correct exposure. Rely on this mode to blur the background or to keep the entire image in sharp focus.

Illustration by Diego Aguirre

Shutter Mode: This setting is your best option for taking action photography. Shutter priority allows you to freeze the scene or artistically blur the picture. All the while, the camera keeps the exposure matched to the aperture.

Illustration by Diego Aguirre

Program Mode: Like Auto mode on steroids, this mode automatically sets aperture size and shutter speed for a perfect exposure--but it also lets you tweak settings, giving you more creative control. You can change white balance and exposure compensation, for instance, and even nudge shutter speed up or down a bit.

Illustration by Diego Aguirre

Movie Mode: Many cameras let you record MPEG or QuickTime videos to the same memory card storing your photos. The videos aren't sharp enough for DVD, but they're great for e-mail.

Illustration by Diego Aguirre

Macro Mode: To focus on extremely close subjects--say, within a few inches of the lens--choose the tulip. You can take life-size pictures of insects, flowers, and other small subjects in this mode, but the focus range at such distances is very narrow.

Illustration by Diego Aguirre

Landscape Mode: In this mode, your camera picks the best aperture and shutter settings for the depth of field that you want when taking pictures of landscapes and other outdoor tableaux.

Illustration by Diego Aguirre

Sand and Snow: Brightly colored or glaring backgrounds can trick the camera into underexposing the subject. This mode overexposes the scene to gain details that would otherwise be lost.

Illustration by Diego Aguirre

Action: The Action (sometimes called Sports) mode sets the camera to the highest possible shutter speed, increasing your odds of getting a clear shot of squirming kids, for example.

Illustration by Diego Aguirre

Night: This mode lets you capture nighttime scenes by combining a flash, which freezes people in the foreground, with a slow shutter speed, which allows lights from buildings, cars, and other elements to show in the background.

The Tempered Steel Photo Introspective on FOX 11 News

2010-11-17T20:27:00.001-08:00

Fox 11 News on the Tempered Steel Photo Introspective

2010-11-11T00:07:00.001-08:00

2010-11-04T10:57:00.000-07:00

Photography & Parenthood

2010-11-01T13:42:00.000-07:00

Sixteen and a half years ago, I sat in front of the Christmas tree with an envelope and a swollen tummy. Inside that envelope was the answer to the ultrasound designating my child's genetic induction to the human race.

It was a girl.

My heart expanded and collapsed. My mind raced. I was terrified. How was I to raise a child? Just because I was one didn't mean I knew how to handle one.

Yesterday that little ultrasound drove my car. I sat in the passenger seat terrified. Again. I had made it this far, raised her with every ounce of motherhood in my being, only to release her into this world. Then it hit me. Not the car next to us, the realization that my job was nearing its end, but was it good enough? Had I earned my wings of motherhood?

The only thing perfect about my parenting has been the love for my children.

After four children, I believe there is no easy way to parent, there is no right way, there are no text book answers. However I did find a parallel...

Parenthood is similar to photography:

Both are birthed by passion.

You are successful not just due to manuals or classes,

but mostly through instinct, dedication,

and an unquenchable desire to create something special

which will someday touch the lives of others.

It takes years to see the results you spent your whole life dreaming of.

The pain of giving birth is relieved in the moment you hold that perfect image in your hands.

There will be many mentors, but the result will only be unique if it's nurtured by you.

Children are like negatives. Not until they fully develop will you see the results of your labor.

Memories are created but never owned,

just as children are birthed,

they must venture out and alter the world

in even the smallest of ways.

It's the little moments nobody else notices which will grab your heart

burrow into your soul

and change your life...

forever.

Sink Your Choppers into This One

2010-10-28T08:06:00.000-07:00

Talking to God

2010-10-27T15:58:00.000-07:00

I looked at the world today...

And had to look away...

All I wanted to see was peace.

So I waited.

We looked everywhere for a sign.

So what's the deal, God?...

The world is this big...Can't you do something?

What?...... It could begin with ME?...

Really?...

Marine Shares Iraq Experiences with Rio Norte Jr. High

2010-10-24T12:22:00.000-07:00

By Carol Rock of KHTS www.hometownstation.com

Students in Ron Ippolito’s history class at Rio Norte Junior High got a first-hand lesson in history Thursday morning when Marine Sgt. Bret McCauley stopped by.

McCauley isn’t a local, but he isn’t that much older than the kids he held in awe. Calling on students who had questions, he’d ask “what’s up?”
The lanky brunette perched on a stool in front of the class, looking much like the older brothers many of the students had at home. He wore no uniform, no military insignia. His blue plaid shirt, black jeans and ear piercings made him look like the musician he returned home to be.

But his story of teaching himself how to play guitar all over again made for a silent and attentive crowd.
McCauley is part of the Tempered Steel, a veteran’s support group that encourages soldiers who were severely injured due to military service to speak to schools, community groups, assemblies and other gatherings about the stories behind their scars to build compassion and understanding for the veterans.

After the Indiana native joined the Marines in June 2001, McCauley spent two years working on the Presidential protection detail. In 2004, he deployed to Iraq and was shot in an ambush in March. Six months later, he and 14 Marines in his platoon were traveling in a truck enroute to Falujah when a suicide bomber drove into the side of the vehicle, killing nine of the men in the truck. McCauley woke up stateside. His left arm had nearly been severed, he lost his left kidney and spleen, had shrapnel in his intestines and severe head trauma. Both of his eardrums had been blown out, his corneas were rippled from the impact and his back was broken in two places.
“The military is not that great at getting medical care to its soldiers,” he explained. “I had 30 surgeries in the first year and was on all kinds of pain medications. I could barely take care of myself.”
When he was discharged from the service, he said he was “still kind of a mess.” He moved out to the West Coast, settling at first in Oceanside near the Marine base, then moving to Hollywood to live with his cousin, who was attending music school.
“About a year later, I was sitting on the couch when the phone rang,” he said. “It was Rhonda from the Dr. Phil Show. I’m not exactly their demographic, but she was calling to invite me to a big dinner that this veteran’s group was having. My mother watches the show and when they announced they were looking for someone who deserved a seat at the dinner, her letter was picked.”
McCauley went to the dinner, which was sponsored by the Iraq Star Foundation, a wounded warrior group. He made some valuable connections, including Tempered Steel photographer Micaela Bensko, who is the daughter of Iraq Star founder Maggie Lockridge.
“Within six months, my arm and head were fixed,” he said.
That dinner turned his life around and he joined the troops visiting classrooms to tell the real story of life in the war zone.
Within a month of deploying in Iraq, where McCauley said they were told they were to operate much like the police, his unit found out that the situation was very different. During a changeover with the Army three weeks after their arrival, he said they were walking down the street, sweltering in long sleeves, flak jackets and helmets and the weight of their guns when he “got a weird feeling that something was going to happen.”
“I told myself ‘you’re in a combat environment, you’re supposed to be nervous’ but I couldn’t swallow the feeling,” he said.
The platoon was inside the city wall with three companies of Marines outside when suddenly a spray of gunfire shattered the night and a rocket flew over his shoulder hitting the building behind him.
“It was mind-blowing,” he told the rapt students. “It was coming from behind us and in front of us and we didn’t know where to cover. We were being ambushed from the rooftops, just 28 guys and me. And the Marines outside never got our radio transmission, so we were under friendly fire too.”
Running for cover, he felt something in his leg snap, but adrenaline kept him going. It wasn’t until the gunfire stopped and he tried to stand that he looked down and saw the baseball-sized hole in his pants and felt the warm blood coursing down his leg.
“It wasn’t at all what I thought,” he said, pointedly speaking to the video gamers in the crowd.
In that firefight, one of his friends was killed; a fellow Marine with whom he’d just had dinner. The students squirmed in their seats as he related the details of his evacuation, explaining that his injury kept him out of a seat on the aircraft; forcing him to lay on the floor of the helicopter, face-to-face with his dead friend.
He was given the choice to be treated and returned to the field or be sent home, and said the choice was very clear.
“I just watched my friend get shot,” he said. “I’m not going home.”
Three weeks before his deployment was to end, his platoon was going down to Falujah to relieve another platoon.
“My squad, everyone I slept with and ate with, we’d done this a hundred times before,” he said. “Then I blinked and woke up two weeks later. I had no idea what happened.”
The suicide bomber that drove into their vehicle was carrying a 500 pound bomb and two artillery shells, decimating their truck. One of his friends survived only because he ducked under the dashboard a split second before the crash to retrieve the bottle of water. Everyone else on that side of the truck was killed immediately.
“It’s the sacred geometry of chance,” he said. “You don’t know why and you don’t know how, but you just do something that saves your life.”
“We don’t really know why things happen the way they do,” McCauley stressed to the students. “The only thing we know is that you don’t get to choose what will happen to you, you do get to choose what you do about it.
“You gotta learn to sing in the rain,” he said, smiling.
After the students applauded his story, he took several questions, which ranged from the innocent to the intensely personal.
“Do you have dreams about the war?” one asked.
“War is nothing you really get over,” he said. “You learn to live with it. And you learn not to think about it.”
His musical career was of interest, and when asked if he plays guitar now, he started to laugh.
“Yes, I learned again, thanks to Guitar Hero, of all things. I started playing a little bit and my fingers hurt at first, but then my hands started working again.”
A young girl asked him if he would return to the military and McCauley hesitated.
”That’s a very hard question,” he said, pausing. “Knowing what I know now, yes. Yes, I would. It’s given me so much fortitude, drive and direction.”
The inevitable inquiry about “have you ever killed anyone?” brought a technical answer, with McCauley explaining how Marines handle such situations with a tactical approach, trailing off into a description of a firefight.
“You probably know already,” he said.
Asked about his years guarding the President, McCauley started to laugh.
“I stood in the woods watching a lot of chipmunks around Camp David,” he said. “It was extremely boring. Sure, I was on CNN, saluting when the helicopter landed and the President would come down the stairs, but I wouldn’t have volunteered to go to war if I liked that job.”
A follow-up question about any threats during his Camp David assignment brought a cautionary answer.
“That’s top secret information,” he chided. “But I will tell you that there were not too many incidents of terrorists in Maryland.”
A boy asked if it was dark when McCauley was in a coma. He answered that the dreams were pretty vivid and strange, but that he heard everything people said. How his brain interpreted it, he added, was sometimes pretty weird.
Asked “are there girls in Iraq?” brought a smile again. “Yes,” he answered. “But they don’t look like you guys.”
“The best thing about sharing these experiences with you is that it isn’t just for you guys to learn about what it’s like, to hear some guy and his crazy war stories,” he said. “It helps me too, to be able to share. The emotional part of healing is a bigger beast than the physical thing.”

Webmaster notation: Sgt. McCauley is a part of the Tempered Steel Photo Introspective, "Honoring the Wounds of War" at The Ronald Reagan Presidential Library. Veteran's Day unveiling is at 11am

Introduction to Sisterhood...

2010-10-21T16:33:00.000-07:00

Big Sister at home

Awaiting the unknown

A key turns

Dog barks echo off the kitchen walls

Tiny feet peek through Mama's arm

Big Sister is no longer alone

unsure

two feet

not four

Is it as fun as a pet? Will it roll on the floor?

We shall see

Until then,

It's time to find out

what sisters are for...

Daddy's Shirt

2010-09-29T13:01:00.000-07:00

His little girls

with curls

slept while he was gone

His badge lands gently on the counter

it taps an echo through the hall

they hear

It lands on their cheeks

a kiss

a knowing

Daddy is home.

"Peace"

"Pride"

"Innocent"

"Surrender"

"The Stand Off"

"Joy"

"Hope"

A Senior Moment

2010-09-22T09:35:00.000-07:00

There is nothing more exciting as a teenager than graduating high school (besides getting your driver's permit, or well, you know...other things kids do...). For Jordyn, Valencia High School, Class of 2011, this was the first time in her life she had ever had professional images captured of herself. As we arrived at the beach in Santa Monica she was prepared with a bag of goodies, shirts, hats, dresses and the enthusiasm of a kitten batting a ball of string ;0) It was play time! Having her Senior photo taken was an adventure, and one I was so very grateful to be a part of. It was FUN, it was LIFE, it was...Jordyn...

Bensko Photography Theme Song

2010-09-09T15:49:00.000-07:00

Children of the Wedding

2010-08-29T11:09:00.000-07:00

There is a joy, an innocence, in most every wedding. It's the history of the bride's childhood her mother sees dance across the face of the seven year old flower girl holding that treasured basket of pedals. The ring barer in the suit is not simply a pre-teen in an awkward clip-on tie, he is the embodiment of the groom's youth passing before his father's eyes.

Children at weddings are a gift to those who cherish that added layer of frosting on the Hostess Wedding Cake. They are a reminder of the fragility of time, moments captured, and of moments lost. They offer an inclination to reflect that we all were once that small, our hearts were once that large, our spirits were once unbridled.

Children have a way of spicing up any event, whether it be with a dash of Cinnamon, Nutmeg, or Cayenne Pepper...It's my personal mission as a photographer to not only capture a wedding day's obvious moments, but also the obscure, the moments lost by the business of the day's momentum.

It was with absolute joy that these children allowed me to wrangle their choas with my lens...sprinkling my efforts with sugar and spice to last, a lifetime...

Watch them fly...

Fifty Years and Losing It...

2010-08-13T05:53:00.000-07:00

You came, you shot, you conquered...or so you thought. That's what I did. On vacation. Until I lost my camera. No, not the big fancy one. It was the disposable waterproof kind, but it would have been better had I lost my big one than to have lost the images I had on that rinky-dink plastic-cased excuse for a submarine.
It was more than a summer vacation to San Diego, it was my wonderful in-laws' 50th wedding anniversary / family reunion, and I was darned if I was going to miss one shot from that entire weekend. With my husband's crazy schedule, my weekends mostly booked out, and with four children scrambling around, any time we are all together is like oxygen shot through a cellophane muzzle.

     So, when the opportunity rose to go sea-cave kayaking in La Jolla with our relatives, I left Big Bertha on land and picked up that yellow disposable which leers at you from the Walmart checkout stand. The one which makes your husband cringe, knowing the film will never truly be developed, confirming his prediction of 12.99 down the proverbial sea-cave...
     As I strapped on my life jacket and helmet, I secured my 12.99 waterproof Hasselblad in my vest pocket and set out on our journey of exploration.
     Throughout our great sea adventure, I proudly snapped away at every breathtaking moment we would never forget for the rest of our lives: kayaking over five foot tiger sharks lurking the ocean floor, pelicans soaring overhead our gaggle of gluttons for adrenaline, the joy on the face of my child with her daddy paddling away with the cliffs peaking, the tides swelling, Joey agog at the seals perched on their protruding bellies...and I caught every moment. I wound that camera like an archaic sewing machine, intuitively searching it's spine for a digital readout or picture display. Click, wind, click, wind, click...
     After two breathtaking hours of capturing images that I knew I would develop and slip into our incredible weekend of family reunion and anniversary images, we returned to our car. I reached for my plastic Hasselblad. I searched through my bag. We drove back to the hotel. We got out of the car. I had lost my camera. My plastic, waterproof submarine image creator had vanished, with every precious water-splashed lens dropping...gone.
     My heart imploded like a helium balloon sucked into a vacuum. My memories were gone, I had lost such a simple object, but it was my best friend through that journey. We clicked, we wound, we clicked, it scoffed at me when I asked it to show me a picture, it smelled like chemicals...it was perfect.
     This made me ponder what made me most sad...was it that I lost the pictures, or was it losing a part of the process that makes capturing memories so special? In my heart, I will never forget those incredible moments. No one will ever take those memories from me, not even the sea, so perhaps it was the process which swells in my soul, an addiction with waves of fulfillment confirming the preciousness of life.

I do have one photo from that day however, one I took with Big Bertha before we set out, of the kids in front of some kayaks. We were at the wrong kayak place, these weren't the kayaks we paddled in, and we all changed our clothes before we launched, but you get the idea...

"Joe, Cassie May, with cousins Turner and Mason, in front of the kayaks we didn't use in the store we weren't supposed to be at, in the clothing they didn't wear..."

And a few others from our weekend...

"Cousins at Bay"

"Utopia"

"Peace"

"I <3 U"

"Wonder"

"Awe"

"Gillette Poster Child..."

"Our Little Bugs"

"Joe"

"Uncle Dave's DilEmma"

"Fifty Years"

Tempered Steel...Honoring the Wounds of War

2010-07-08T16:18:00.000-07:00

The door opened and a waft of cool air released from the frame, expelling the San Antonio heat from my skin. A kind, bellowing voice welcomed me in, accompanied by a nervous growl from Duke, his bohemoth Mastiff raised with gentle hands but wearing the genetic twitch of an electrocuted rabbit. Bobby Henline's home is the haven of hope, possibilities, and through his wife's exquisite execution, a Martha Stewart homage to all that is still right in this world, in spite of what happened to him in Iraq, where he was severly injured in an IED explosion in 2007.

As I waited for the day's photo sessions of wounded warriors to begin, my eyes crawled the walls of pictures of his beautiful wife, Connie, and his three children. My eyes stopped on four frames lined up like soldiers saluting their leaders, each photo matted with a poem written by Robert, before and after his accident. His wife's photo held with the matting a poem he wrote the week prior to the explosion, from the front lines to his love. Each child's photo with their own personal expression of devotion and pride, each a private dedication to their altered lives since their father changed.

Only Robert didn't change on the inside, he is still the same wise cracking jokester he was before, only now perhaps even bolder, with greater courage and fearlessness. When most patients are burned as severely as he is, with 38% of his body covered in debilitating scars, their spirits are often injured beyond repair. For Robert his injuries opened a door of unusual opportunities which have changed his perception of life's purpose and given him a new mission, a mission without weapons of iron, but the weapons of Tempered Steel.

Tempered Steel is an organization started by Iraq Star soldier Scott Stephenson and his mother Luana Schneider after he was seriously wounded and disfigured in Iraq in November 2006. Their mission is to break down the barriers between wounded and disfigured veterans and those who only see their scars. The goal is to exchange fear for enlightenment by exposing the very real human stories behind the wounds of war, and I am honored and humbled to have been asked to shoot their Tempered Steel Photo Introspective of wounded military veterans.

Scott and Luana contacted other severely wounded military members and asked for their participation and involvement in the portrait sessions, and the response was overwhelmingly, "YES".

The images will be accompanied by personal interview accounts culminated by Amanda Cherry-Haus. Amanda and her husband MSG James Haus were recently featured in an interview with Bob Woodruff for World News with Diane Sawyer addressing the alarming rate of veteran suicides. As a military spouse of a soldier with severe PTSD, Amanda has educated herself on the issues gaining certification on PTSD treatment and causes. She is currently starting her own charity called W.O.M.A.N.-Women of the Military Advocacy Network, to focus on the unique needs of military women and families while working with Tempered Steel.

We shot our first sessions in San Antonio at Robert Henline's home, with such an incredible response by those involved, that an additional day of sessions was added. Since then, the project is moving full steam ahead.We look forward to a traveling gallery exhibit to the cities of San Antonio, Chicago, New York, Washington D.C., San Diego and Los Angeles with images also accompanying Tempered Steel's injured vets as they travel the country sensitizing our youth to the value of acceptance by speaking to Junior Highs and High Schools across the country.

Robert Henline, graced with the armor of humor, insight, wisdom, and irony, is now a professional comedian. He has embraced his new extreme makeover and travels from club to club with the most outrageous of comedy routines, never skipping a beat and reminding the public of the power of the human spirit and the beauty that lives within the most unexpected places.

www.temperedsteelinc.org

Here are a few images which have been publicly released so far.

Scott Stephenson, Co-Founder of Tempered Steel and Iraq Star Warrior

Luana Schneider Co-Founder of Tempered Steel

Preliminary Imagery of the Tempered Steel Photo Introspective to premiere 2011

Aspen Bliss

2010-06-10T09:28:00.000-07:00

Mount Sopris sprung through the backdrop emitting it's grandeur upon the back lawn of the prestigious Aspen Glen. Shakira and Noah, from Miami, juggled bipolar weather forecasts of pending storms (a continuing theme in my latest May-June weddings) yet won the meteorology sweepstakes with gorgeous skies and 75 degree winds. The most precious flower girl, Mollie, (with a touch of stage fright) melted the guests. They toasted Mother Nature with bubbly and danced the night away with stars a flutter and candles humming by outdoor fireplaces. As I sat under the pristine skies, having shot my last image, I reflected upon my job and realized...life is good.

Grace at the Jefferson

2010-06-07T06:34:00.000-07:00

The skies taunted Grace & Adam for days, constant threats of thunderstorms and tornados...yet! Mr. Jefferson stood firm, seemingly emitting a protective umbrella of defiance resulting in a perfect day of simple overcast and fleeting humidity. Here are just a few samples of our session at the Jefferson Memorial in Washington D.C., the ceremony took place on the West Lawn of the memorial that afternoon. This wedding was the perfect example of a couple who got it right, enjoying every aspect of their day, and chalking up any possible hiccups as simply another anecdote of their wedding day to share with their future children. Pure joy, pure love, pure bliss...it was MY blessing to know them, to cheer them on, and to shoot them...;0)

The Art of Balance

2010-05-11T18:01:00.000-07:00

Balance....If you Google the word (yes, I know google is technically a verb, but a name as well, ergo the capitalization, so live with it...;0) I digress...If you Google the word balance, you get fitness programs, health bars, scales, gymnastics schools, and most interestingly...disorders.
Yes, disorders. This is about the reparation of my own balance disorder.

According to the experts, with the lack of balance, you may feel as if the room is spinning. You may stagger when you try to walk or teeter or fall when you try to stand up, suffer vertigo, feel as though you are going to fall, feel confused or disoriented. I'm usually pretty balanced, or so I thought, give or take a vino here or there. But what happens when normalcy dissipates and suddenly your life becomes unbalanced due to elements out of your control? In our case it was a leak, two leaks, and toxic mold. A black furry Build-a-Bear type of fuzz that crackles when you think of touching it. It bathed the intestines of our drywall and threw us out on our derrieres and into an apartment with four kids and two dogs. Our entire downstairs had to be rebuilt, the kids were suffering allergic reactions to the furry beast, Emma on a nebulizer and Joe with asthmatic reactions, the house was deemed uninhabitable.

For many a night, snuggled in my favorite polar fleece jammie pants with little white bunnies in pink scarves, lavender oil slammed into the pores of my nasal passages, and the echo of Larry King dancing on the walls of my ear canals, my dreams had begun to take the form of Hitchcock, wavering with three dimensional angst and altered in a halo of distant obscurity. The upstairs neighbors vampires, stalking the corners of their apartment, renovating caskets with which to house their prey...

At first it was an adventure, something new. As my dear friend Lou said when she was diagnosed with the C-word, "Well, I'm looking forward to this actually, it's a NEW experience." So there we were, fleeing our home's C-word, and hovering the corner of a world we found completely foreign, trying to adjust.

In a matter of months, we have had to create an entirely new existence, and make it work for us, all the while the rest of the world stood strong, clients were still calling (Thank God), my husband still had to return to work, the children still had school, lessons, but childcare had completely bifurcated.
To balance work and home-life as a working mother is never, ever done alone. My friends jumped in whenever possible helping with pick-ups and drop-offs.

Through this experience, I've realized that as important as it is to have structure and balance within a home, it is just as important to have structure and balance within one's self. I had become so dependent on the physical structure of the home, the logistics of timing of schedules, the essentials of the daily calendar obeyance, that I had completely forgotten the importance of the balance within. I ate like a redneck at a meat-and-three diner. Exercise had become a verb simply used as an expression, and daily schedules had become a pacifier leaving me sucking away dependent upon the metronomic normalcy of life to feed me the oxygen needed for survival.

We moved into a tiny apartment, yet this apartment has taught lessons with a wooden ruler leaving precious splinters in the fingerprint of my soul. These are lessons learned which have breathed into us a new life-perspective.

You see, suddenly, as blessed as we still were of course, we had to now walk the dogs three times or more a day down a stairwell and through a gate to the boulevard roadside where our home's neighbors waited at the light to turn left to our old neighborhood. The occasional honk and wave of their hands, the uncomfortable nod and reserved smile, not wanting to show too much joy as they knew I was indeed now walking my dogs on the boulevard in front of our apartment and unable to return home. I'd wave and flash the largest smile I could muster which best complimented the roll of my eyes. Yet those walks woke something inside me which had previously grown accustomed to the laziness of opening the door to the back yard and dismissing the canines to the out of doors.

This was a sentence to take a new look at life. Those little walks outside, the obligation to my good furry friends, reminded me of the simplicity of smiling at fellow dog-walkers (while holding back my innocuously venemous Chihuaua with the Nepolean complex-mix and restraining my apoplectic Dachshund...) We had no childcare now, and I still had a company to run, weddings to shoot, clients to take care of, a husband who needed me present to help with insurance claims and raise our babies, contracting issues to address, as well as oodles of images to edit and laundry out the gege. I was back at square one, attempting to figure out HOW to "do it all". On top of all THAT, I turned 40.

Cathartic barely touches the surface.

Yet it was during this period of time major life changes were made, so that if life ever rears it's follically challenged head again, this girl is ready.

My entire system's internal ecosystem has been transformed from the inside out. Yes we were stuck in an apartment, but HEY, this building had a GYM! I exercised for the first time since my first child screamed in my ear! So what, one of my knees blew up like a blowfish with a bong, I was actually being healthy! Our increased visits to restaurants during our domestic expulsion made me realize the downstairs of our home wasn't the only thing needing reconstruction. I went on a complete health kick. Living in a small space made me realize that if I had to be stuck with myself in a small cell for the rest of my life, I had better like the way I FEEL. NOT look, but FEEL!!! Anyone who knows me knows there is not a french fry on this continent I have not overturned. No longer would I be labeled the Miracle Whip queen, or the Velveeta Princess (I'm not kidding...these are actual adjectives ingrained on my frontal lobe...).

My friend introduced me to the Flat Belly Diet way of life, and I'm born again. Look it up...your life will change.

So why is a photographer's blog talking about a domestic disturbance of the Home Depot kind? Because I've realized we can all try to do it all. We can all have balance when life is normal. But if I had had this other type of balance, the internal balance of a healthy lifestyle and healthier outlook on being internally balanced, this curveball could have been a much easier transition. It was during this transition that our lives were placed under the microscope and I realized what wasn't working. Even though everything had looked functional, it didn't mean I was present in the most intimate aspects of life.

In our apartment, our children share rooms, the youngest girls have decided that if we ever had to live in an apartment they'd do just fine as it is a glorified hotel in their eyes (only without the room service, maid service, spa service, concierge service...) We had birthdays in the park, walked around town and got to know our community better. The dogs have learned to walk on a leash, my husband has realized he really, really, really likes our house, and yes, our two teens, a boy and girl, have learned that they really do actually despise one another...and I have decided that no matter how busy life can be, I will never return to normal. Normal was redundant, expectant...As cramped as this apartment has been (we move back into our home next week) it is still not a tent in Haiti, or a shelter in Nashville or Oklahoma. We are blessed beyond words to know that our family, as dysfunctional as it can seem at times, is one which has been brought together not only physically, but in spirit.

As excited as I am to return to our home, to have my workspace back, to put my photos back on the walls, a part of me will miss this little apartment. (A VERY small part of me...) But that part is one I need to keep close to my heart, as it taught me to simplify, that we don't need all of the "things" we thought we did. It has taught me to let house cleaning go a bit more and snuggle my babies more at night rather than do laundry. I've learned my children love art and coloring more than computer games, and I haven't visited Farmville once since we got here.

I love my home, my family, my friends, my clients, my life...and now with new balance the only teetering, vertigo, or nausea I am going to feel is from my arms spinning in relief as we re-enter our home, forgive it for it's indescretion, and remember the teacher with the ruler and the spintered fingerprints...forever.

The Tree of Wife

2010-04-21T15:55:00.000-07:00

Sometimes a wedding is about the guests, sometimes it's about the flowers....this time, it was about a tree. A large oak cradled the couple in its belly. Fingered shadows tapping their skin. As the ceremony blossomed from this tree, so did our post-wedding session in a secret, hidden area of Los Angeles I shall only reveal upon death and scripture...ok, it's near the beach...ok, it's a state park, but that's all I'm sayin'...
Enjoy the magic of Jason & Anya. My rock and roll bride and groom, who are currently sipping from coconuts and learning how to say Humnnukunukuapua'a under a different type of tree...

Headshot Trauma Remedy for BFA Grads

2010-04-17T16:21:00.000-07:00

I do believe I have stumbled upon a remedy for the Theatrical Major Headshot Trauma...

Texas State University recently invited me to photograph the graduating Seniors of their Musical Theater and BFA programs, providing the graduating students with professional headshots with which to begin their acting careers.

In a two-day period we completed twenty sessions. Each session included hair and makeup by celebrity Makeup artist Dean Jason Hampton.

Throughout the process, a series of instructional elements were implemented with information necessary to achieve a successful photo session in the future.

In addition to being photographed, the students also received support in the following areas:

1. Aesthetic preparation of skin, hair, grooming, Camera-Ready preparation for session arrival
2. Selection of clothing: solid hues, attire appropriate for professional imagery as well as audition
3. Lighting, posture, composition, textures of backgrounds
4. Breathing techniques, posing options
5. Make up techniques
6. Hair grooming and styling
7. Clothing selection and preparation
8. Understanding and respecting the essentials of personal presentation in the world of audition
9. Reflecting their self with confidence and appreciating the value of their personal self expression with pure validation of the power each individual holds within
10. Encouraging self esteem and creating a platform of confidence from which they will be able to securely reference upon entering the entertainment field

Kindly view the Texas State University portfolio at
http://www.benskophotography.com/slideshows/tsu09/iframe.html

Bio feature on the Texas State website as Visiting Artist:

http://www.theatreanddance.txstate.edu/TH-DA-Degrees/Musical-Theatre/MT-Guestartists.html

Dean Jason Hampton www.makeupbydean.com

Texas State Promotional Collage for Senior Showcase:

Newborn Parents

2010-04-15T09:36:00.000-07:00

A tiny hand envelops his father's thumb

sensing the future through the ribs of his fingerprint

Holding it with a natural confidence

despite months of grasping through an ocean of fluid

longing for connection

His mother's hair tickles his nose

it crumples

he sneezes

she laughs

he looks

she stops

He is theirs completely

A bond

no one else could ever understand

could never fully comprehend

it is as unique as a snowflake cut from Nature's hem

Their voices bounce off his heart

the echo calms his soul ensuring him he is home

They speak of an angel

he searches their eyes

the reflection of his silhouette shifts in the light

He answers with a visceral tale of garbled glee

bubbles blossom from between his lips

Mother guides his tiny hand to cradle her cheek

closing her eyes

she breathes into his hair

translating his monologue of innocence

They now know the meaning of life

As simple as their bond is profound

The meaning of life is not only in the palm of their hand

it is holding it...

Rockin' the Bump

2010-04-06T11:26:00.000-07:00

Bumps are sexy. Perhaps it's the unexpected confidence some pregnant women find in the lack of desire or ability to suck in our tummies. The freedom of wearing elastic waistbands without judgment. It's a time when celebrating a bloated belly is the most natural and liberating feeling in the world of estrogen. Our DNA explodes with possibilities and our hormones collide in the euphoric wrath of orgasmic ashe from which diamonds emerge without flaws...
Ok, perhaps this is true for some, for others the experience is one of a uturine cataclysm resulting in esophygial eruptions with women begging for relief from the cast of the porceline gods.
Either way, there's an underlying feeling in some women to simply see themselves as the pregnant goddess they are. It's a time when their bodies could never be more naturally beautiful, when the life growing from within connects those around her like a web with sachrine threads collecting the energies of those yearning for a connection with all that is right and authentic in this world.
This blog is about celebrating not only life, but the beauty in its creation and the joy in embracing the process...of rockin' the bump...

Shoot with Dean Jason Hampton

2010-04-05T13:31:00.000-07:00

There are a few makeup artists I've worked with who's work truly takes my breath away.
Dean Jason Hampton is one of them

He is an artist

I not only view as a co-worker, but a dear and cherished friend.

www.makeupbydean.com

Our shoot last Friday was for his current Spring/Prom Promotion:

Bereavement Photography

2010-03-27T21:43:00.000-07:00

It is the strangest thought to capture photographically the images of bereavement. When my grandmother passed, my father asked if I would bring my camera to the services. This was Tupelo, Mississippi, home of the birth of Elvis Presley. My grandmother, known to us kids as Mama Mary, was a bit of a celebrity in those circles, as my great uncle twice removed delivered Elvis in exchange for a sack of potatoes. No lie. Not even blue suede shoes...just a sack of potatoes.

So, with the quirkiness that begets a family memorial in Tupelo, we arrived at the service after having visited Elvis's little house, the one bedroom post-natal facility in which he took his breath, a few blocks from where my Mama Mary took her last.

You see, Mama Mary was the epitome of southern flair and hospitality. Visits to her home culminated in a sealed vat of sweet pickles and jarred figs. The trees were meant for target practice as squirrels scattered among the branches dodging the elements of confederate angst. Yet all seemed perfectly unsettled in the web woven from the beauty of Southern charm.

Mama Mary's passing was one we saw coming, yet could never truly be prepared for. In capturing her service it seemed as though I were armed with a lens protecting me from the obvious. By photographing the progression of the day I was able to somehow remove myself and process the event by observing as the fly on the wall, yet also allowing myself the indulgence of soaking in the tiniest of moments, the most intimate of moments, without feeling overtly indulgent.

The following is very personal, and it has taken a bit of time for me to feel comfortable sharing these images as they are quite intimate at times. I learned from this experience, that in capturing her passing, I owned the reality that she was not present. She had passed to another realm and I was only photographing the experiences of our loved ones mourning her loss. She however was free, and soaring, and loving everyone with the sweep of her spirit across the lens. The capture of these moments was not only healing for my family, but for friends who could not attend the services in person. Somehow her passing seemed not as much of an enigma, more of a personal experience they could hold on to and revisit even if through the virtual realm. Even now as I revisit her slideshow for my blog, my heart aches for her fingers settled on my shoulder, the smell of cucumbers pickling in her kitchen , and the aroma of gas leaking from her stove. With all of my heart, I know the world will never be the same without her here, but I also know the world is different because she was...

www.benskophotography.com/slideshows/tupelo

Wedding Mojo for Him

2010-03-09T16:23:00.000-08:00

The ring festered a hole in your pocket for weeks. You were afraid to leave it at home as she might find it, or you might forget where you put it. You broke every logical bone in your body and paid the appropriate price ratio per income as stated in your future mother-in-law’s Emily Post book. Perhaps you even went a half-karat larger than her best friend’s ring just because you could. You got down on your knee, or your blackberry, and popped it. You asked the one question, which will eternally change your life forever. You asked her to m…..mmmmm……mmmmmaarrrr…..mmmmaarrrrrry……you. She said yes. She cried, you cried (even if it was just on the inside). Suddenly life shifted into a blissful arena of congratulations or Mazeltavs and you realized, hey, maybe there is something to this whole getting married thing after all….

It was as though someone sprinkled pixie dust on you and your beautiful fiancé, yet slowly you realize the sprinkles are falling on her side of the silver lining. Well-meaning friends send suggestions and referrals to her inbox, stacks of bridal magazines collect on her nightstand heckling your edition of GQ, and suddenly it seems the most important dress in her life is a complete enigma to you.

This is the most exciting time of your life. It just seems the one moment you’ve held off on your whole adult life, the proposal, took all of thirty seconds, and the wedding planning euphoria can go on for a year. How did this turn out so unbalanced?

This is about getting your “wedding mojo” back. This is about saying to yourself, it’s ok to want to be a part of the most fantastic experience you and your partner will have for the rest of your life, along with the possibility of children or winning the lottery. Planning a wedding is not just for women anymore. It’s the perfect opportunity for two people to venture into the world of decision making as a team, with a guideline and structure, excitement and joy with every florist they uncover.

When little girls are growing up, most are sociologically raised to dream about their wedding day. This has been engrained in our bone marrow. Men however, are not only raised without this expectation, but are then thrown into this blender of expectations after the proposal. The only thing the florist seemed to ask you in the consult is whether you were allergic to carnations (in my not-so-humble opinion, the first thing you do is run from any florist who even mentions carnations…)

Take a moment, light a cigar, tell your honey your catching up on the sports stats in the other room, and let’s begin…

Planning a wedding is not just about the wedding. It’s time to stop, and realize you are no longer one person living your life a certain way. From now on you have a partner with which to share not only life’s burdens, but life’s pleasures as well as the decision making. Getting married is one of your first greatest pleasures, one that will be shared by the people closest to you in your lives personally and professionally and will forever be the barometer for every decision you make together in the future. You will be able to reflect on how you worked together, how you came to certain decisions, and when and how either of you decided to compromise.

Am I a psychologist? No. Have I seen enough weddings to fill a lifetime? I’m workin’ on it…and through each wedding I’m privy to many dynamics between a bride and a groom and in many cases the groom truly is happy to “just show up”. Nowadays however, it seems there’s been a shift in the groom. He is more aware of not only the delicacies of their woman’s desires, but grooms nowadays are also more involved in the finances of the planning, even more of a reason to maintain that open communication during the planning stages. This is not only a chance for you to be more involved in the creative aspects of the planning, it’s also a chance for you both to be aware of the budgeting and planning of a day meant for both of you to treasure, leaving you with a sense of pride that you entered your lives together as best friends, on the same path, with the identical objective of honoring one another’s ideas, preferences, and visions while protecting your most valued asset, the respect you have for one another.

The greatest suggestion I have prior to any of the following logistical bullet points in planning your day, is to sit on the floor of your living room tonight and face each other. Hold hands and look into each other’s eyes. Before you launch on this planning journey together, take note of who you are in this moment, before any of the decision making begins, before the world has opportunity for opinion, and chisel in your mind the exact people you are right now. It is the person in front of you who has your back, who is your best friend for life, and it is their opinion, their wishes, their priorities, which should mean more than anyone else’s. This is your day, to be shared in front of others, with their wishes respected of course, but ultimately a wedding is symbolic of how the rest of your life will proceed. You are a team, with a mission to love one another and protect one another against the world, and it starts now…

So, don’t be afraid to step up tonight and take your fiance’s hand, and let her know you are looking forward to venturing through this crazy period of planning together. Let her know you actually have an opinion when it comes to flowers if you do, and speak up about the fact you've always wanted to eat those tiny, miniature corncobs from the movie Big and that you've secretly longed to toast with Tequila shooters...

On the more logistical and dry note, adding a touch of structure to the mix, here are the groom’s official duties…Besides of course being the voice of reason when it comes to those bridesmaids’ dresses…

Emily Post's Duties for the Groom:

· Select the engagement ring – although now-a-days brides may also be involved in choosing the engagement ring.

· Choosing his wedding party: best man, groomsmen and ushers

· Choosing the attire for the groom’s wedding party – in keeping with the style of the wedding

· Selecting thank-you gifts for his groomsmen

· Arranging – and paying for – lodging for his groomsmen

· Selecting a gift for the bride

· Compiling the groom’s part of the guest list and making sure that his parents provide their guest list.

· Planning the honeymoon – Today, this, is more of a joint venture

· Choosing wedding bands together

· Arranging for and purchasing the marriage license

· Making arrangements for transportation from the ceremony to the reception site, if necessary

· Planning the bachelor party or event (if applicable)

· Giving the ceremony officiant the fee or donation, or arranging for the best man to present such fees

· Standing in the receiving line, if there is one, or - with the bride – being sure to greet all the guests at the reception

· Making toasts and responding to toasts at the rehearsal dinner and the reception

· Dancing the first dance with the bride, dancing with the couple’s respective mothers and the maid/matron of honor.

Wedding Planning 101

2010-03-04T11:23:00.000-08:00

OK, what the heck does a photographer know about planning a wedding? I mean, all we do is show up and shoot, right?
In actuality, it is the photographer who is essentially the mole of every wedding. It is the photographer who is there from beginning to end, has seen what works, and what doesn’t, and we notice when things run smoothly, or not, and why!

First of all, if you do nothing else first in planning your wedding, re-frame your mind, your thinking, your entire DNA and reboot...you are now a Bride and a Groom.

The first thing to do is plan for TWO budgets. Create a low-budget wedding, which will get you into Heaven with a fast pass. Then plan a higher-end gluttony budget, which will result in a temporary stay in Purgatory. Why two budgets? Because this will allow you to really clarify what means the most to you, and what you can do without! Think about it! When you have to sit and think about what is MOST essential to your day, your priorities are set and you have that referral base to refer to when you start to get out of hand and the local psyche ward needs to be summoned with their ceremonial bridal straight-jacket.

1. Once you have determined what is most important to you, get those vendors set in stone EARLY. Did you know most photographers book about six months in advance?

2. Saturday is not always the best day to get married...There are many vendors who are willing to adjust their rate for a Friday night or on a Sunday! The most popular day to book is Saturday, so the demand is there and the pricing on all vendors as well as locations are at their peak. Also, really think about an off-season wedding! You’d be surprised at the extra-delightful tone you would receive on the other end of the line by vendors if you approach them with a January, February or early March wedding. This is slow time for the industry and everyone has come off of the holidays. This is a great time to look for deals even from the most elite vendors ;0)

3.    Don’t be afraid to look at vendors your other vendors recommend. First of all, if they recommend someone, there’s usually a reason. The vendors I recommend, I’ve seen in action, I love not only their work, but their personalities!!!! Remember, as I said, vendors are people too, and the personalities of your vendors will help to dictate the personality and vibe of your entire day! You may have found a florist with gorgeous flowers, but what if they don’t work well with others, what if there are certain restrictions with the church or with the reception area and they get super cranky and upset the planner/coordinator and then the florist doesn’t care as much as they used to so your flowers show up an hour late and the photographer is off schedule and the portraits are late, so the mother of the bride is cranky which results in an argument which is heard by the priest…..well….you get the idea…

4.    On items that mean a lot to you both, make sure both bride and groom meet with each and every essential vendor together. I was pleasantly surprised when my manly hubby-to-be actually cared which flowers we used! You end up learning a lot about each other and realize that the decision-making you are enduring and sharing together in planning a wedding is a wonderful blueprint opportunity for how you will be making other decisions in the future. This is a time, which will be the barometer for future negotiations. Don’t be afraid of this experience, embrace it and realize that this event is a gift to yourselves as a couple embracing the rest of your lives.

5.    Remember that a big wedding is not always going to be the most memorable. Well, to rephrase….you may remember the debt….but please, from the bottom of my digitally archived heart, know that your guests really don’t mind if they don’t go home with a silver plated shot glass from Tiffany’s. (well, ok, I’ve secretly longed for such a treasure, but we’ll keep this to ourselves…)

6.    Your friends love you, THAT’s why they are there! OK, you may have some social climbers and dysfunctional family members as well, but in the end this is a party for you and your loved ones. Period end of story. Don’t forget this when planning your wedding. Select flowers which make you FEEL beautiful, which will brighten the hearts of those you love. Don’t go picking bouquets to impress. If you choose elements for your day because they feel right to you, it will all fall into place. This may seem whimsical, but I’ve seen it over and over again.

7.    Don’t be afraid to hire a wedding coordinator for Day-Of services! Many coordinators offer this service at a minimal expense in the larger scheme of things!!! It is a GIFT to yourself and your family, your mothers especially, to have that one contact person for all of the vendors, who ensures that your day will go smoothly. They do it all that day…and are your best friend so that your maid of honor and best man can do their jobs of tending only to you, not running around trying to contact the linen guy because the tables aren’t set yet!

8.    If you are getting married outside, if there is even a 10% chance of rain, MAKE SURE YOU HAVE BACK-UP TENT PROVISIONS!!!!! Make sure the site, or your planner has this locked in. I shot one of the most beautiful weddings in Malibu where it got completely rained out and the entire table settings were drenched,favors were ruined, and the entire reception had to be reset during the ceremony...

9. Think of your wedding as your baby which is growing and festering inside. It is your belly, nobody else's, and you have the right to tell anyone not to touch it. Your wedding is your personal space, to be respected. Yes, if your parents are paying for part or all of it, it is the loving thing to do to inquire as to their suggestions, but in the end it is up to you as to how you will remember your day.

10. Most of all, remember NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, LIFE IS ABOUT STORIES! Not every wedding is going to be perfect, there will probably be little things here and there which can go wrong, but at the end of the day there are only three people who need to show up: You two, the minister, and well…..let’s make it four (your photographer…;0)

Angelino Magazine

2010-03-03T10:49:00.000-08:00

We are so grateful at The Iraq Star Foundation for this coverage

by Angeleno Magazine of our Night of Honour event!

Bensko's First 48

2010-02-25T17:48:00.000-08:00

The First 48 is my baby....

Fresh for Spring, and ready to rock and roll.

Sample First 48:
http://www.benskophotography.com/slideshows/ryder

Finding Purpose in a Glass Bowl

2010-02-22T14:03:00.001-08:00

A hard cover edition of Time’s Haiti Tragedy & Hope sits on my desk as I type this, a woman’s silhouette bathed in devastation graces the cover. The tragedy has been covered by more photojournalists than anyone could imagine, the images searing. In Port-au-Prince, a child stands by the hospital bed of a dying father, a young boy stares into his future with a bandage embracing his scalp. A dump truck drives by carrying hundreds of bodies on their way to a mass grave. The captions are not simply descriptions of the images, but also reflections by the photographers themselves. This publication affected me not only as a photographer, but as a mother, wife, and fellow human being, forcing me to reflect upon the enigma that is life's purpose.

This blog is not only about the people of Haiti, but about fourteen children in particular of the Ettienne family. When the first earthquake hit, their house was still standing, but fractured. The parents, each brothers and sisters themselves, decided it was safer for the family to sleep outside on the grass until they could repair the home. It is because of this decision that the children are alive today. You see, when the second earthquake hit, the house collapsed. The children and mothers survived, however each of the men, the breadwinners of the family were at work, and have never been found.

I was introduced to the Ettienne's situation by my friend of twenty years, Dr. Wendy Walsh.

A few weeks ago Wendy went to the supermarket, a woman was bagging her groceries. The same woman who had greeted her for years, but that day there was no smile. She looked down as she bagged, sad and introverted. Wendy, concerned, reached out grabbing an unexpected moment and asked what was wrong. The woman’s name was Jennette Ettienne. She was from Haiti. Those 14 children were her nieces and nephews, and she had just learned that not only were all of the children ages two and up now living in an open park, but that they had not even a tent over their heads.

Within days I received a Facebook invite from Wendy asking her friends to please come to her house that Saturday night for pasta, to meet Jennette and her brother Robert, and to contribute whatever they could to her family. (Both Jennette and Robert moved to the states from Haiti ten years ago, working in Los Angeles at eight dollars an hour and living together in order to send the monies home which support their three siblings, fourteen children, as well as their seventy-five year old mother.

Many responses to the invitation were regretting their inability to attend. I had had a very difficult week myself, as my childhood friend had died a few days prior. My initial response to Wendy’s invitation was also a regret. Then I spoke to Wendy on the phone, and life shifted. Wendy’s passion for the Ettiennes was intoxicating Suddenly, in my own selfish moments of darkness from losing my friend, a match was lit.

My teenage daughter, Macky, and I arrived at Wendy’s home, to a lovely crowd of people, pasta and dishes she'd started preparing at 3:30 that morning, and a glass bowl. In a matter of thirty minutes my daughter turned to me after speaking with Robert, and said her life was changed forever. That night I learned a great deal about Haiti. Prior to the earthquake in Haiti the unemployment rate was 85%. Why is it important to give where there seems to be little hope or future? Why put forth efforts in a region where for decades the government has been operated by individuals who have obsconded with international aid before and purchased mansions, keeping the wealth from the people of Haiti? The industry of agriculture used to be fruitful, however due to poor educational systems and lack of regulations the land of over-processed and soils are now unfit for crops. The industry of tourism which at one time saved many residents by creating jobs, became a wild circus of again unregulated chaos and the cruise ships stopped visiting, Americans became concerned regarding safety and health issues. With tourism, the population in Port-au-Prince exploded from 500,000 to now over 3 million people. Now, 1 million of those people are living in parks. Many of these people do not own even a tent, and the tents that were for sale at $300 a piece in town, are now sold out. The cost of charging a cell phone is $25. In essence, cash is now king in Haiti. The ability to wire fund allows the recipients to purchase most necessities available in Port-au-Prince if you have the means. Yes, there is aid, food and water trucks visit tent camps, but getting to the trucks is a risk of physical and emotional health. Lines are hours long, sometimes a full day to receive rations needed. Most women are now sole caregivers of children in their care, with no men to assist. Most men had jobs were at work at the time of the quake and have never been recovered.

That night, Wendy's glass-bowl-gathering placed a total of $1000 in that bowl. The Ettiennes could now obtain the tents they needed. The next day, Jennette and Robert purchased the tents and they were shipped. But this was just the beginning…

Last weekend my husband and I were fortunate enough to introduce Wendy, Jennette and Robert, to our friends in our own home. We copied Wendy and put out pasta and wine, and a glass bowl. We set the glass bowl on the coffee table as our loved ones greeted one another with laughter and hugs, embracing Robert and Jennette and for a moment, hopefully reminding them of some sense of hope. Jennette and Robert shared their family’s story. At the end of the evening the bowl was gifted with $700 and handed directly to the Ettiennes. Their warmth, their humble gratitude, the love experienced at this gathering was more grand than any dinner party or five star evening out. Lives were changed that night, not because we had all met someone famous, or because someone won the lottery. It was simply because we all were grounded in a tangible reality that we were helping specific individuals, friends, who will benefit from our union.

There was another moment that evening which rests in my heart. Prior to the Ettienne’s arrival at our gathering I had a flash, an idea. Wendy texted me the names of the children on their way to our house. We pulled out fourteen tea lights and set them above the fireplace, one for each child. As the evening commenced, each candle was lit as we spoke the children’s names, and these children were forever seared into my heart.

There now lies in the core of my being a longing to meet them, to know them, to truly understand them. I feel a pull to visit Haiti, to photograph, capture the hope left in their eyes, to sleep in the tents we have raised for them, to be cold at night and hot during the day, to be hungry and thirst. Time will tell if I will be able to sit with the Ettienne family in person, but in the meantime there is work to be done, more glass- bowl-gatherings to procure. The next one is coming up and this time Robert is going to prepare a cultural evening with a fully Haitian buffet including Ox Tail…and I will devour every morsel as I listen for the slight reverberation of the glass bowl as it receives another gift.

The question many ask is why should we help this one family, when millions are in the same situation…how can this truly make a difference? We were created as individuals made to connect with others on an individual level. When man first set foot on this planet we didn’t have mass communication, television, CNN, newpapers, or book stores. Amazon….that was just a jungle. It’s a time for us to reconnect with the core of our being and remember the importance of connecting with fellow human beings on an intimate and authentic level, beginning one relationship at a time.

This is our chance to make a difference in the lives of fourteen children who we are connected to, who have mothers who love them no less than we love our own. Fourteen children who still see hope in the world. This is why we should help, because we are meant to, and this is our chance to be a part of helping where there is no opportunity, where there are no jobs, where where they deeply and truly need....us.

It is my belief we are here not to become famous, or be rewarded for magnificent feats. I believe this because anyone I know who has achieved great stature whether it be celebrity or wealth, still carries burdens, many of which were birthed by their perceived blessings. Although I sit here the hypocrite with hopes that someday I too might achieve a certain level of success where I can make a difference in this world on a grander scale, it was simply these children which secured my belief that one's purpose in life need not be something aggrandized by others to have an impact, or have meaning, but can actually begin in one’s living room...with a glass bowl...

If you too would like to donate to the Ettienne family,

kindly make payment to Jennette Ettienne.

Mail payments to:

Dr. Wendy Walsh

171 Pier Ave. Suite 393

Santa Monica, California

90405

The Fourteen Ettiennes:

Melline

Chrisner

Roodiery

Rosedaline

Chrisson

Claude

Nickenson

Wisly

Wislene

Valencia

Fitho

Joiner

Jouveline

Wilbelline

Groomzilla

2010-02-17T13:45:00.000-08:00

As I arrived at one of my very first weddings, the bride glowed, a long radiant gown and train befitting a formal ceremony. Her father stood with chiseled features absorbing every pore in her face as memories of her childhood danced on her face. She swept through the courtyard, her dress flowing in the breeze as I captured black and white imagery of her leaning over and whispering in her grandfather's ear. This was going to be the most amazing wedding ever. The stage was set, the characters were in place, the guests had arrived, and suddenly in the depth of my soul I felt the odd vibration of the theme from Jaws reverberating in my spine. I turned around, he stood tall, basketball player tall. He was big, his groomsmen towered over me like Soprano henchman in bowties. Although startled, I smiled and held out my hand as this was the groom, the precious enigma which had eluded me for 6 months, the knight in shining armor who had swept this beautiful girl off her Cinderella heels. My Groomzilla had arrived...

My outstretched hand waited, his eyes glared an absent gaze as though his soul had drifted into the middle realm until this unfamiliar exercise in manhood recoiled at midnight and he could then come out to play. He turned to the grunts of his fellow Neanderthals, pointed forward toward the lair which housed his maiden of sacrifice, and left, leaving my hand as a receptacle for fly waste. In that moment, my heart imploded, my ID deflated, and everything I thought I knew about human beings flew into the apse of that cathedral. It was at that moment I realized that not only will there be clients you don’t connect with, there will be some who could care less if you even exist. You see, I had never met the groom, only the bride, and the last thing he cared about was photography.

As far as he was concerned, I was a gnat to be ignored or swiped at if I came within the parameters of his bubble. He had a very thick bubble, one with walls of selective hearing, as though only the bride could hear me speak and she had to translate my directives to him in Neanderthal.

I picked up the pieces of my psyche and slinked into the cathedral, my assistant by my side staring at me, waiting for my affirmation that all was still right in the world. My second shooter stood firm in the upper balcony blissfully unaware of my emotional crux. I smiled, all was fine. I was a professional dressed in a lovely black dress appropriate for such an affair. I could have actually been a guest had I not been schlepping lenses and batteries or had a 2-inch blister on my shooting hand from last week’s mitzvah. The groom was simply nervous, he didn’t really understand that I was that photographer his fiancé had been speaking about for months, who’s images she adored, and wanted to name their first born after….OK, I digress…

It must have been a simple misunderstanding, I was sure. Had to get my head back in the game, the same game these Soprano henchmen were in. I lifted my chin, got out the long lens, readied myself as the groom stood at the alter, the organ began to fill the stained glass with shards of deliverance. As the doors to the cathedral opened and the light poured in behind her, I grab her figure in the center of my glass and then out of nowhere, like the antichrist whispering in my ear I hear, “my dear, whatever you do, do NOT use flash and do NOT cross the aisle”. I whip my head around to see the nun in piano key garb flit through the side door, returning my gaze rapidly to the money shot about to go down the tubes. Once again my nerves rattled, I regrouped, my second shooter still in the balcony. The bride walked down the aisle with a beaming father, but this time each step this bride took ebbed to the soundtrack of the single woman’s death march. Her lilting expression quivered like a child learning to ride her bike, her daddy attempting to steady the handlebars, and at the end of the aisle he let go. She smiled at him to comfort his broken heart, protecting him all the while knowing that she was the one who needed saving. Don’t let go of the bike, Daddy, stay just a minute longer. The guests won’t go anywhere, don’t let go, don’t let go…..And yet just as is scripted, in every wedding she’s imagined and played over in her dreams since she steadied those handle bars, just as she had planned for 6 long months, he let go...

She turned to her groom, his face pocked with fossils of adolescent acne and eyes demanding her gaze, and in that moment became the very woman she knew her parents wanted her to become. She knew now that she had the perfect union, the perfect future, the perfect life…with my Groomzilla.

The ceremony came and went. Now it was time for the portraits. Portrait time with the hearing impaired, I mean the groomsmen. As I attempted to raise the level of my voice to garner the attention of the bridal party, the groomsmen meandered through the lawn like elephants swinging their tusks, whipping nibbles from the bridesmaids’ bouquets and lapping their tongues in the air as they guffawed their many tenors. It was then the groom leaned into the same ear blessed by the antichrist and said, “if you don’t control this crowd, no one will…” He turned, and returned to his herd. Instead of being the true gentleman and husband of his new bride, and simply directing his pride to the portrait location, he waited for me to assert myself, to earn my right to life, to pass this test of credibility. I succumbed, I channeled the town cryer, announcing each shot. The suggestion to move in close to one another was met with questioning jeers from the henchmen as though I were speaking in Swahili with a French accent. We proceeded to the sand...a dream of the bride. The bridesmaids were amazing, gleefully flitting off their heels and running into the sand, leaving in their wake the bevy of buffalos snorting at the sea of sand as though each grain were from the planet krypton threatening the demise of their people upon contact. They stopped, a frozen breed, one by one their heads cocked in my direction, eyebrows inverted and palms to the sky…..the leader of this pack….my Groomzilla.

I love my job. I truly love my job, but everyone has that one day in their career when they stop and say to themselves, "Someday we'll look back and laugh at this". This writing is my laughter. As a matter of fact I'm absolutely gaffawing inside.

We finished a perfectly executed portrait session. They huffed and puffed and blew my heart down. I swore, if I lived through that day, that hour, that reception, I would never eat anything unhealthy again….I would become a saint and build homes for children in Malawi…..

The band played on. The moments of the bride trying to talk her groom into certain poses, her playfulness ignored, his cool hand luke now baring the golden ring he obtained through the grace of gods, were dissolving into misty ocean fog parading by the windows. To all in attendance, this was the most magnificent wedding they had ever seen. I turned around the images in a matter of a week with each and every image catered to as I would the most blissful of shoots. To top it all off, the images of this wedding were published in a major magazine. But the accolades were bitter sweet. This entire experience could have been completely different.

You see, the groom is the leader of the groomsmen. His energy will dictate their energy. He will lead and they will follow. It’s up to you to learn beforehand what makes your client tick, who he is as a person. I may have seethed a touch of sarcasm during my telling of this tale, but truly everything that happened was ultimately my fault. I’m the captain of the ship. I needed to know who I was working with so I could better understand how to direct. How can you conduct music without knowing the instruments in the orchestra? You can’t promise a quartet and then have a trombone show up and expect to create soothing music. I was so thrown off by this seemingly illogical and antisocial groom, that I immediately overcompensated in trying to make the bride especially happy that I ended up a puppy chasing its own tail hoping I’d catch it and that my owner would notice.

In the end, even with the images published in a magazine and their wedding a featured article……I received a call from the groom. Hoping for a moment of gratitude I puffed for a lovely conversation, only to sense a slight hesitation……,”Micaela, we love your work, but we were hoping there would be more close-up images like you see in the magazines…”

If life is about lessons, I learned a lot that day. I learned that even the worst of days breeds herds of knowledge for me to pull from, bits of experience hopefully not lost in the Swahilian translation. But most of all, I learned that it's essential not only for my client to like me, but for me to understand my client. I must have a solid grasp of who they both are. It's OK if photography isn't his thing, but if I had taken the time to meet with him as well, I could have garnered this jewel of information and chiseled it as armor for the big day. I have encountered but one Groomzilla in my career so far. I understand there are others out there, captured in fumbling shadows, lurking amidst the herds...I stand ready in wait with my cross-hairs, I mean my camera, loaded...

Depth of Field is Not Just the Number of Cowpies You Are Standing In

2010-02-17T10:57:00.000-08:00

What the heck is depth of field? Photographers hear it all the time…shallow depth of field, greater depth of field. Now that Aperture and Shutterspeed are clearly cemented in your brain, let’s look at why they are so important.

A shallow depth of field is when the part of the image closest to the lens is in focus, and everything behind it is more out of focus. The extent to which this occurs is dependant upon how wide you open your Aperture, or how small your f-stop number is, as well as the focal length and distance the subject is from the camera. The smaller the f-stop number (ie: f/2.8) the sharper the immediate subject and the more blurry the background therefore providing you with an image with a shallow depth of field. This is a technique popular with portrait photography where the family or individual is crisp but the background has a blur or a haze. This is because the photographer set the f-stop to provide a shallow depth of field.

My colleague Rick Rosen explains Depth of Field with the following:
Depth of Field is a factor of:
1. The focal length of the lens. The longer the lens the less the depth of field at any given aperture and focus point when compared to a lens of shorter focal length.
2. The aperture. The more the lens is closed down to a smaller aperture (larger f/number) the more the depth of field will be at any focus point.
3. The distance from the camera position to the subject. The closer the focus the less the depth of field will be at any focus point. The farther away the greater the depth of field will be at any aperture.
4. Depth of field extends 1/3 in front of and 2/3 behind the focus point. This is the relationship at infinity focus but as you focus closer that ratio changes to eventually become 1/2 in front of and 1/2 behind the subject.

From my personal experience, be careful when shooting groups. Upon photographing more than one person in a group, make sure each person is within 12 inches of each other in reference to their distance from the camera. Everyone should be no more than 12 inches behind or in front of their friend or family member is when you are choosing an extremely shallow depth of field such as 2.8 (or in some cases lenses can run as wide as a 1.2 or 1.4. Be careful when using a small f-stop like this as one person will be in focus and the rest will look like they are in a drug induced haze...) Distancing yourself from the subjects can create a greater depth of field eliminating this issue, also allowing you to shoot at a larger f-stop. Also, using a longer focal length and smaller f-stop can trip you up if you are shooting a single individual as if you are shooting at 1.4 and focus on their nose, their eyes will be out of focus.

You achieve a greater depth of field when you set a larger f-stop number such as f/3.5 up to f/22 etc and distance yourself from the subject(s). In this case, you would be more likely to be shooting a sports event or landscapes. Remember, the smaller the opening (larger the f-stop) the less light is allowed in, so you will need to consider upping your ISO and possibly slowing your Shutterspeed if you are not using a tri-pod. This is why many landscape photographers use tri-pods. They most commonly shoot at dawn or dusk, in low light situation. In order to photograph a crisp landscape with a greater depth of field, and with an ISO of 100 to allow for low noise, they need absolute stillness as they will need to set the shutter open longer, sometimes for a minute for more at a time.

So there you go! Let the barn door open and set the cattle free! OH and don't forget to wear your boots...

The Three Scoops of Photography

2010-02-16T11:33:00.000-08:00

Just because one has an instinct for taking pictures, does not mean he/she intuitively understands the basics of photography. Like a teenager placing the cherry on his much coveted dessert, he knows it tasted great, but it's not until he's an adult when he will stop and ask what made that sundae so good...

The three scoops of photography are the Aperture, Shutterspeed, & the ISO. Understanding the dance how Aperture, Shutterspeed and ISO work together, is key to obtaining properly exposed images and achieving the aesthetic you see in your mind’s eye, no matter if you are an aspiring shutterbug or one rockin' the town. You'd be surprised how many people make a living in this industry without grasping this essential concept of how these three scoops of photography work together.

One photographer of note started his business without even knowing what Aperture and Shutterspeed really were and took a course at her local community college in Photography 101. After that, she took out a loan for $20,000, bought a full-page ad in a national bridal magazine and started charging 10g a wedding. My goal is not to create monsters here, it’s simply stating that even though some photographers do have the confidence to break out like Godzilla at Legoland, sustaining a career which offers you true fulfillment or legitimacy will not be possible without truly understanding the basic elements of photography.

First of all, the goal here is get you out of Automatic Mode on your camera. The only way to do that is to actually understand Aperture, Shutterspeed and ISO. Oh goody! Isn't this fun? Here's some nitty gritty for your photo kitty....

Aperture

In regard to Aperture, think of your eye. The Aperture is essentially the pupil of the camera. When the pupil dilates, it opens up, letting in more light. The confusing part of the Aperture is the numbering system. In photo speak, the smaller the

Aperture, the larger the opening. This does make sense if you think about it though, as the Aperture is considered one “whole”. If an aperture could open all the way to be a wide as possible it would be at 1. Most lenses open up to 3.5, a really solid pro lens opens to 2.8 and my favorite is my 1.4. The benefits to having a lens with a “wide” Aperture capability is that when it is opened wide, it lets in more light, allowing you shoot in lower light situations without using flash. Now, the smaller the opening, the less light allowed

in, and the number goes up, ie: 16, 22. Etc. These numbers are called f‐stops or the f/number. That’s why in photo books you will see them referred to as f/2.8, f/3.5, etc.

Shutterspeed

Shutterspeed is the amount of time that the shutter is open. In the days of film, it was the time the scene was exposed. In digital photography shutter speed is the length of time that your image sensor ’sees’ the scene. Think of yourself driving in a car watching the scenery fly by. The faster you go, you get quick sharp glimpses of what is outside the window. The slower you go, you capture more detail information in your mind. When you want to photograph someone or something that is moving or jumping, it’s ideal to “up” your Shutterspeed to capture your subject, usually to around 125-250.

Remember, the larger the Aperture, the smaller the f-stop number!

The Smaller the Aperture, the larger the f-stop number, isn’t this FUN?!

ISO

In fancy speak, stay with me here cuz this hurts my brain.... ISO is actually "the speed of photographic negative materials" (formerly known in the film world as ASA).

The ISO number tells you how sensitive your camera is at that moment in relation to the amount of light you are shooting in.

The higher the ISO number, the more sensitive your camera is to the available light, and the more likely you will be able to capture the image in lower light situations. In the old days, you used to have to switch the entire roll of film to a different film ASA, but nowadays, it’s simply switching the dial on your camera to alter the ISO (the ASA equivalent). The reason I explained the Aperture and Shutterspeed first, is that the ISO affects these settings in order to create a proper exposure. Now, of course it’s so easy to stop and say, but why don’t I just use flash? But what if you can’t use flash such as in a performance or at a wedding, or you simply wish to avoid that “flashy” look.

There is a trade-off however in being able to up your ISO to craziness that many camera bodies allow nowadays, like 3600….Unless you are operating with a high end body, your sensor is sensitive now not only to light, but to all elements involved...

which means more information from the actual camera and sensor, which

results in more digital noise in your image. For some this can be a

creative choice, for others it’s an unexpected annoyance needing to be

resolved with the use of noise reduction filters which can add an

unrealistic element to the photograph taking out the authentic capture.

I hope this bit of rehash wasn't too dry...sometimes it's necessary to bite the bullet we've shot into our creative psyche and nosh it a bit so the metallic skin embeds in our teeth leaving the aftertaste we need to appreciate that hot fudge sundae of life that is photography...

Shooting from Body Parts

2010-02-13T11:28:00.000-08:00

There are 3 ways to shoot. From the head, the heart, and the hip. Learning to shoot from each of the body parts at the same time is what I like to think of as the tri-fecta of perfect capture.

Think of the last time you prepped for a shoot. Were you too fatigued to be inspired, or your mind was on the Superbowl and the fifty bucks now gasping in someone else's snakeskin wallet. Had you shot the same family four years in a row and now as teenagers they want nothing less than to be in your presence that day because Lady Gaga was at the mall dressed like a snow cone on crack…

It’s days like this some shooters figure they know enough technically that all they really have to do is get the shots and fix the lighting later in Photoshop, rather than put forth that extra bit of effort to seek it out, or inspire their client. This is called shooting from the head. Although a necessary element to photography as the head is where the information lives, the key to being successful on days when your creativity has taken a spa day, is knowing how to compensate by shooting from the hip, and the heart, as well as the head.

The key to activating all three aspects of this tri-fecta is to first accept that they exist in tandem, and never rely on just one of them to get you through a shoot. Shooting from the heart is pulling on your own personal emotional energy store, not one you've manufactured just for this shoot. I mean giving yourself the ole pep talk of why you started shooting in the first place. When you look into those children's eyes, think of your own children. When you hug your client upon arrival, remember that each parent is entrusting their memories to you, and each bride is somebody's baby. Allow yourself to feel the experience on a gut level. (I would have called it shooting from the gut, but that just sounds wrong....)

Then there's shooting from the hip. This is definitely not what it sounds like, because there is nothing casual or unscripted about this. This is about embracing the physical energy supply you must not only muster for this shoot, but have access to on a daily basis as a working photographer. For some shooters, they fast for a couple of days prior to a wedding to clear their head and their body. If I did this I would collapse. For others it’s a yoga class prior to the event or shoot. Some people need a good night’s sleep and a breakfast of scrambled eggs, others need a Vente 5-pump Chai Latte with non-fat, no water and an extra shot….(that would be me…).You’d be surprised how much your client feeds off your energy, your charisma, your ability to inspire THEM. They do not expect to simply show up for a portrait shoot and not be instructed on how to pose, or not to have their experience framed in some way. Your attitude, your joi de vivre (I've always wanted to use that in a sentence) will make or break a session. Even as a photojournalist performing a portrait shoot, there must be a sense your client has that they are not operating without a net. If it means inspiring yourself by bringing red lollipops for the children to play with, go for it! Go to the local grocery store and buy a bunch of solid colored helium balloons and watch their eyes pop as you exit your vehicle...

It’s a personal reflection as to what it will take for you to connect with your head, your heart and your hip shooter within.

The greatest athletes in the world have to get into their headspace before a game or competition, but they don’t do this by simply replaying the rules in their head. They rev up their enthusiasm, they pray to fill their heart, they cheer on themselves and the other players involved. Every event you shoot should be looked at not only as a competition to prepare for, but an experience that will determine if there will be another shoot or event to follow. Just as in athletics, just as in the movies, you are truly only as good as your last shoot. Head, hearts & hips, unite...

Valentine Engagement Special

2010-02-12T15:10:00.000-08:00

Book with Bensko by the end of March

Receive one night's accommodations at the SLS Beverly Hills...

Life is good.

310-990-8389 to arrange a consultation

Birth, Death & Taxes...

2010-02-08T17:05:00.000-08:00

Most photographers would kill to cover a war, an election, a riot, but in reality, most of us are not ready for a photo shoot to become a life or death experience for anyone involved. The closest I’d come to that before was a mother of the bride who drank too much tequila in her Evian bottle prior to the ceremony and fell off the alter…Believe me, photojournalism is the axle which drives this girl, but ethics in capture are not only relevant to the streets of Baghdad. Just as we make choices on how to shoot, we must make choices as why to shoot...

Birth, Death, and Taxes. The three things we are sure of in this life, each affecting our existence in profound ways, but I couldn’t imagine attempting to capture the process of paying taxes on camera. I’m afraid that would take a wide angle…
Capturing birth, now that I’ve done, living at my client’s hospital waiting room, perched on the single-ottoman-excuse –for-a-chair for 22 hours, camera propped at my side, I sat jealous of the zees it croaked as I clicked the power switch on and off in an attempt to jar some life into the process of capturing the most miraculous experience God gave man (and woman). I’d had four children, yet had never been on the “other end”. Suddenly my text “bllllings”and I am notified the time has come. The team was ready for blastoff. The Zombie photographer must rise as I am summoned to the delivery room, a bathing glow of catheterized light beckons me into her lair. The hallway rumbles with muffled verbage as I near the portal of reincarnated kings, Room 208.

I was ready. Or so I thought. Her legs were spread. My eyes were wide. The husband slunk in the corner. Their children sat with their nanny in the corner coloring pictures of unicorns. She was a pop star, he was not. The doctor was famous, the nurse was not. I was exhausted, the baby….well, let’s just say we understood each other; Our senses collided in kinship, both locked in a room with people we did not know, the air being sucked out of our lungs, the lights burning our eyes, and unaware of what the next push may bring. The medication created a surreal ease to the Mom, almost a stoned like haze and benign detachment to the process, unaware that the medical bracelet she wore revealed her actual age. The doctor’s orders barked gently through the blip of the fetal monitor, push after push, like a salmon swimming upstream the baby glurbed forward, then back, then forward, then back, then….he stopped. The salmon hit a rock he could not maneuver around. The waves slapped at his back and his gills flapped against the waves. The air filled. My heart raced. The nurse moved…quickly. I shuttled to the back of the room, clicking my shutter as though nothing were wrong, as though the salmon was fine. The doctor’s hands which once held his own image in People, grappled for the forceps, the protection of competence clasping the challenged calm of his face. The not so famous nurse laid her body over the pop star’s belly, pushing with all of her Slovakian might. The king had crowned, his septar grounded in the womb and refusing to un-earth. The father got up. The children drew unicorns. The doctor cleared his throat. The nurse was the flight attendant on the crashing plane, not a wink of alarm to concern the passengers on this journey…

I had placed myself in the unfathomable position of witnessing two of the most certain elements of life occur at one time. And no, this had nothing to do with taxes…

To what degree should we as photographers put our wellbeing not just physically, but emotionally at risk? Not much can go wrong at a funeral. The worst has already occurred. The images captured reflect the final moments of a loved one’s life. I was simply hired to capture the beginning of life. For the very first time, I realized, I am not wonder woman with a lens. Forty-eight hours without sleep, I left room 208 with images of a beautiful, recovering, healthy baby boy. The doctor’s silver strands shifted to a slightly darker shade of graphite, the siblings coo’ed over his tiny head as the father stroked his cheek. I witnessed a miracle, captured the first moments of life outside the salmon stream, but why was I so numb? My passion for my job became the energy source needed to propel me through the boot-camp of birth photography. I couldn’t help but thinking, what if I left without images of his sisters cooing to the beat of his twitching fingers stumbling across his nose. What if …

What if I had suffered emotional damage due to the fact I had placed myself in such a precarious position? I was not a loved one there to support my family or friend. I was hired to observe and capture as beings played the eternal game of fetal roulette. The fact is, is that birth is a natural occurrence, but even natural herbs can be dangerous. Just because we can, doesn’t mean we should. Just because I can be hired to cover a birth, doesn’t mean I should. Sometimes as photographers we get so used to saying yes, to accepting a job because it is something new or different, we don’t step back and weigh the potential consequences of our choice.

Of course, if this birth had gone smoothly, if he weren’t blue and limp when he emerged, if he had been breathing right away, if the doctor weren’t awkwardly famous and fumbling, if the father hadn’t slept through half of the labor and if the children hadn’t been coloring unicorns in the face of death, I may have looked at this experience a little bit differently. The little boy is healthy and lives a perfectly normal pop star life now, the father is still narcoleptic, and I’m afraid to ask what the siblings are drawing now, but what I have drawn from this life choice, is the ability to stop, and to think about why I am adopting a particular position as a photographer.

I left through the visitors’ gate after subconsciously attempting to exit the employee driveway, made my way to the nearest hotel room as I was too exhausted to make the 45-minute drive home. The streetlights morphed into a kaleidoscope of octogons, eyelids folding down like garage doors off their track. I was fried. Fried as an ovary over easy in the Egg McMuffin of life.

There will be times in your career to place yourself at risk. For me, I opted to create my own version of birth photography, The First 48. Entering the hospital within the first 48 hours of life, I am able to enjoy the process of welcoming a child into this world in an emotionally safe environment where I feel I am truly contributing to the joy and sharing of new life. I welcome the doctors and nurses into the room and embrace a job well done. I exit through the right gate and return home to my children a fresh and fulfilled parent. As for the emotional roulette, I’ll save that for Baghdad…

Photography in Service

2010-02-03T07:41:00.000-08:00

Tony stood at the Alter with a halo. Not your usual halo. This one clung to his leg, the white pant fabric safety pinned around the black metal brace holding the screws to his bone. No one expected him to wear his dress Blues that day. No one expected him to be able to stand that day. Tony was back from Iraq, having been blown up by an IED for the second time. He is a marine…

I met Tony through my work with The Iraq Star Foundation, offering free reconstructive surgery to our troops returning from Iraq and Afghanistan. As these troops gradually became family to me, I began to understand the sacrifices couples endure while serving in the military.

If you’ve ever seen the movie Hurt Locker, that was Tony. He rendered-safe IED’s in Iraq. We met during his first dental reconstruction through our foundation. An explosion left him with a shattered jaw among other injuries. With his beautiful fiancé and fellow marine, Melissa, by his side, Tony recovered. After this first reconstruction and recuperation, he voluntarily re-deployed…only to be blown up, again.

At this point, his left leg and hand were completely shattered. He returned to Walter Reed, and the surgeries ensued. They had a civil ceremony next to his hospital bed, we ordered balloons and a cake, and our East Coast Warrior Ambassador, Rosita, made sure all of the logistics were secured, clicking away with her point and shoot like an expected parent witnessing the birth of possibilities.
Although their impromptu bedside wedding was perfect in its execution and purpose, it was not the wedding they dreamed of. You see, it was Spring, and they had set their Fall wedding date prior to his re-deployment, and by no means was Tony going to change that date. As far as he was concerned, his actual wedding date was now the carrot on the stick. His bride was going to have the wedding she had dreamed of, and he was going to walk down that aisle come hell or high water...and he did. November 21, 2009, SSgt Tony Lino stood at the Alter with legs firmly planted in the mortar of a 19th century Palo Alto church. With his cane propped next to his side, halo on his leg , and Blues pressed by angel’s hands, his armored gaze shot down the aisle with anticipation. This was his new life, his reason for living through it all, his heart was 50 feet away and slowing walking toward him in a haze of bridled light. I crouched at his parent’s feet, stealth in my attempt to capture every moment of this reunion of purpose. There is no pay, no fee, which could ever create a greater fulfillment than I experienced at that moment. As family and friends witnessed their vows, anecdotal ghosts from the years of pain, challenge, devotion, danced across their words and set them free to fully love in face of all that was meaningful.

If shooting such a job Pro Bono is a selfless act, then I think I’m doing it wrong. Every time I experience the act of working under conditions such as this I feel selfish. The emotional quell of operating in a zone of expectations bread solely from a mutual respect and gratitude between the couple and myself is a personal treasure beyond any monetary value I could imagine.
At the end of the evening I stepped back and asked if I gave enough, because throughout the process it was me who received. The constant flow of appreciation and kindness not just from the couple, but from their guests left me feeling unworthy. Yet each new friendship developed throughout the evening was bread from the common thread of understanding and connection to two very normal souls carrying the burden of kings…

Tony & Melissa Wedding

The Iraq Star Foundation

Finding Light in the Dark

2010-01-31T20:28:00.000-08:00

The steel cold bars of her hospital bed framed her eyes. Oceans of lapping blue curiosity gazed at me oblivious to her predicament. Emma Jane was 6 months old and in the fight for her life...

Clients’ names bounced on my caller ID, the ringer off, and voicemail full. We had been through this all before and I had my system down. The portable coffee maker from Walmart sat atop the dorm sized fridge the candystriper found in the nurse’s lounge. My cot eased with a folded down comforter, I’d sneak her out of her crib at night, winding her IV’s through the maze of machines to our little bit of heaven. She curled into my side, her head resting in the nape of my shoulder, breathing into my soul. Only this time I’d brought one extra bit of comfort, my camera. I wasn’t sure why I brought it this time, it seemed a bit inappropriate to take pictures of your child in the hospital. So much of our journey was plagued with uncertainty. 15 doctors, no diagnosis. The slightest cold would manifest itself in one of her lymph nodes on her neck and infect, abscessing and resulting in surgery to remove the node and infection with fevers reaching 105 at times. I was running on pure adrenaline each time we ended up in the hospital, 6 times in all. I was helpless, without answers, without direction, without control….except for one thing. I could capture her moments, I could hold her in time, I could make it all ok, creating a reason for that moment to exist outside of that cold, white room. I wasn’t just going to be a mother sitting helpless with her child. I could alter this experience. These were moments I would never have again, the isolation with my child, just she and I against something larger than us. Suddenly with the camera around, I could reframe the fear and remove the anxious moments by viewing her through my lens and capturing all that was beautiful in that moment. The silhouette of her tiny head enshrouded in a ray of light from the machines. Her tiny hand holding onto her IV as though directing its nourishing fluids into her weakened veins. In her eyes I was able to see the catch light in her soul assuring me everything was going to be fine, she was strong and beautiful, teaching me to embrace all that was right in the world, even when everything in that moment seemed so very, very wrong. It was during this time I didn’t dare to use flash, I could only operate in high ISO mode, with impossible white balance situations. Suddenly having to understand the technical aspect of photography was mandatory. It was in these darkest hours of my life that I finally understood….light.

The light in Emma Jane’s hospital room, to the naked eye, was cold and bland. Yet because I had become one with the environment, I was able to sense beyond the obvious. I was connected to a story being told by the shadows, through the arc of her hair in an unexpected silhouette. The gauze bandage on her neck illuminated in the darkness, a metaphor for the protection of her fumbling innocence. The juxtaposition of her wounds and her peaceful eyes, the unbridled trust she had in the windows to her soul. Light is not always ambient, it sometimes travels from within.

A story is told with the use of shadows. I learned from that time with Emma, that all light is good light, it’s just different light. It’s how you use that light that makes it interesting or not.

However, there is a light that is my favorite of all the lights. I call it the Sweet Spot. The Sweet Spot is your best friend, and lives in almost any building, any house, any location. The only issue is, it plays hide and seek. You simply need to know it’s there and it gladly comes out to play. This treasure is located within the fall of shadows, but not all shadows or shades, you need to learn how and where to look for it. In the hospital the light draping into the windows allowed an oasis of possibilities in capturing the perfect catchlight in her eyes. The most common location for a Sweet Spot is in doorways, or even in the dark abyss of your garage…. The darker the room with an open wall, window, or doorway to the light, the more precious the glow.
Emma is a healthy, rambunctious child now. A Dennis-the-Menice of sort with the nickname DilEmma. She raptures us in all her chaotic grandure, leaving me remiss in the ability to capture the camera quickly enough, thank goodness for the iPhone...

I've learned much from my mentors, held their wisdom close and prayed endlessly for osmosis that one day all of their knowledge would be embedded in my subconscious. Yet it was this innocent child, in the darkest moments of our lives, when I truly wakened to the beauty in embracing the imperfections of life, and light...

An Aloha to Film

2010-01-29T22:16:00.000-08:00

Sitting with my father outside our hotel room, listening to the glub, glub of dolphins carousing in the lagoon, the Kahala has awakened memories unstirred. The leis draped on my bedpost resurrect images of stringing Plumeria in my yard as a child. Yet it's not only the scent of flowers that's brought back my childhood in Hawaii. It was a visit to Haleiwa today and a local photographic exhibit of black and white underwater images of turtles which yanked the chain of my inner child, when the photographer proclaimed he shot everything...on film...

The sweet putrid aroma of photographic chemicals wafts in my memory. Black and white photographs dangled on a string handcuffed by clothespins over the toilet. This was our darkroom. I was 10, dad loved photography, and the most logical place to conduct the transformation of images to paper was on a fold-down lab, which he ingeniously anchored like a Murphy bed above the porcelain god. It was where we worshipped possibilities, dipping and drenching the 8 x 10 sheets of magic into solutions witnessing images cross the middle realm to the harsh reality of our 1970’s orange painted bathroom. Mom had painted it orange to match the box of Tide. Why it was orange still perplexes me as the box of Tide never entered the bathroom. Hawaii in the 70’s, not much about style made sense to me, but one constant was the pursuit of the perfect photograph, and my father was the master hunter. He’d prepare for the capture with Praktika in hand and a crackling brown leather bag impregnated with filters and lenses for any possible scenario. Rolls of film marinated in every ASA, color, black and white, slide film. The real photographers of the day shot in slides. National Geographic only accepted slides, he would say. If you really knew what you were doing, you could shoot slide, because if you were a half stop off, there was nothing you could do. Slides scared me. The technical aspect of photography, the actual science of the capture, crouched in wait on my father’s tongue, anticipating that perfect moment to leap into my psyche and implant its infinite knowledge within my frontal lobe. This game of proverbial darts never quite hit the bullseye. I spent my childhood fascinated by the process of taking pictures and developing photographs, but it somehow seemed if I knew what I was doing, the magic would dissolve into the developing solution….

For years, my father sighed, all the while grateful we shared a common interest. His glossies reflecting the floral fauna of Mauna Loa, the Plumerias from our back yard, the rainbows over the Koolau Range, had a character about them that was uniquely my father. His exposures perfect, the colors birthed from the papers. All I knew was someday I would understand what those technical things were, like Aperture and Shutterspeed, bracketing and focal length...but not yet…I wasn’t ready to be a real photographer. I was having too much fun…

Then came the disposable camera. Creative botox for the budding photographer. It was too easy. One hour labs were the drug den of my adolescence. I’d hover outside the glass door peering in at the clock on the wall, the hands creeping around the face until time was up and I could visually scarf that yellow envelope of 36 glossies. Each 3x5 was a fossil from the day, a surreal activity in reliving moments gone. I didn’t even think of whether they were exposed properly. Unless there was a little sticker with a red exclamation point apologizing that my technical discressions were beyond reproach, I figured I was fine. To me, it was all about the moments. Pure unadulterated capture of that wild and untamed blip on the radar of history that will never be again. It was the ubiquitous urge to revisit the past which truly ebbed into an obsession akin to that of a shopoholic. I could not get enough of the fix. Some women bought shoes, I bought film, shot and conquered, without the tools to break down the perpetual barrier of competence. The guardian angel of photographers hunched above my kitchen table, her head in her hands waiting in the frustrated clench of a disapproving parent with unconditional love. Just as with any addict, it was up to the individual to admit they had a problem. You see, in the beginning, it was not about perfection. It was not about technique. It was about the process, the purchase of the yellow box with the black vile, the popping open of the cap and the threading of the film through the impossible crease in the cylindrical rubics cube that was my camera. It was a rite of passage to learn to thread film properly into the camera so that just enough of it backtracked onto the camera's belly. There was delicious anxiety in wondering if I had threaded too far in, and once the door was shut, the process could begin...the technical gymnastics unseen by the naked eye, until the trigger would freeze on that final frame announcing the end of that creative journey.

As my drug of choice has morphed into the virtual, and slightly perplexing form of digital, it was film which laid the foundation for all I know and love that is photography. Although I love my computer, I cannot smell the evolution of the image, nor massage the paper through the chemicals in the hard drive. Yet it is because of that Murphy bed of possibilities above the porceline god of Tide, that the essence of film development has been reincarnated in the method of all I do today. The tones, the levels, the highlights, must mimic that of film, gradiating throughout the image with the flow of a visual tide. What is now receding into the history of our medium, is not something to be seen as archaic, but as the foundation from which all creative imagery potential today...this is for me, the aloha of film...

Becoming the Photographer...

2010-01-28T01:31:00.000-08:00

Our friends and family love us, they want us to succeed, and they are the first to tell a little white lie to make us feel good about our passion. This may be hard to hear, it’s difficult to even type, because it’s a lesson I had to learn in the beginning and wish I’d had someone to tell me otherwise. The truth is, we all do certain types of photography well in the beginning, but not everything we do is brilliant. The first thing I’d do is get away from your family and get new friends….just kidding…..
When I first started shooting professionally, my friends had given me a little too much positive feedback that, in a way, worked against me. The problem was, I was only showing my work to friends, and not to seasoned professionals from whom I could learn. I was not very good. Yes I had instinct, but technically I was worlds away from being as good as my friends said I was. I was blind to the reality of the work I had in front of me. It wasn’t until one of my dearest friends, who happened to work in the entertainment industry, sat me down after a headshot shoot of hundreds of images and she said, “these are acceptable, one of them is great, but where is the brilliance?” This was extremely difficult to hear. I believe a glass of wine followed as I wallowed in what I felt was criticism. In reality, it was a wake-up call. If I wanted to not only be successful, but respected as well, I needed to step it up. Every single image I posted had to be pretty darned close to perfection in all of its potential or I shouldn’t put it up at all. So, there began my quest for artistic vision.

What was going to make me stand out from the rest…..?

In order to have a photography business that constantly moves forward, accumulates income, and enhances your quality of life, you need to absolutely accept that photography is not simply a hobby any longer. It must be the primary focus above anything else in your life except for family. All day, every day, every waking moment should find you curious about the world in which you live and how you can capture those moments in a unique way. You need to not only think, but live outside the box of normalcy. When others are going to lunch, you are developing your website, your blog, watching Photoshop tutorials, creating your own actions, learning Lightroom, playing in Bridge, mastering images, shooting friends for free, marketing complimentary services to elementary schools, shooting your children's teachers' families as holiday gifts for all they do. When you have done these things a hundred times, do them again, like a mantra. Your life is about creating imagery, figuring out the market you wish to target, discovering what you are truly gifted at whether it's studio photography, portrait, weddings, editorial. This, by the way can take years to sort out. The only way to truly know where your gift lies, is to do any and every job that comes along whether it seems interesting or not. Say yes to all and work your tail off to do it right. Keep your pricing reasonable, and as soon as you have that "Ahah" moment, of where you know you really are that good, that's when you focus on a field, put on your seatbelt, and get ready for a wild ride. They say it takes 10,000 hours of practice to become a star at anything. With that in mind, don't look at this as a sprint. You are in the marathon of your creative psyche and this is a journey which will hopefully last a lifetime (or until you are ready to retire.) Pace yourself, but understand that no-matter how much you love photography, there is somebody around the corner who loves it more, who is fresher and more willing to pay their dues.

The greatest gift you can give yourself, is to find a mentor. Locate a successful photographer through a friend in your area. Most people can offer a personal referral to someone they know who has made ago of their photography business. If they seem successful, there are various reasons why, but one of the most common threads is they’ve learned the art of the edit, the market, and customer service. They’ve learned the practice of sorting through images after a shoot and listening to their gut reaction as to whether an image is good or not, what stirred them upon viewing it. They’ve learned through the reactions of other professionals what is truly a brilliant image, or solid photograph, and what is a smart image to post as it will provide revenue (as these can be two completely different things).
The bottom line is, whether or not you can build a career as a photographer is solely up to you and your actions. If you keep moving forward, if people continue to be attracted to your work, if you open yourself to the mentorship of those who have gone before, and have the willingness to embrace your flaws and give them the ultimate extreme makeover, then yes, you can become the person on the street who is "the photographer".

To be quite frank, it wasn't until not too long ago, when I looked down at my beaten, toughened, sore, achy knuckles...when I realized the inner cradle of my right thumb is now chronically black from the camera body, my skin callused like a dancer's foot, and my hands showing the labors of my love, when I realized that yes, now, I can finally and wholeheartedly say to myself, "I am a photographer".

Destination Photographer 101

2010-01-27T01:40:00.000-08:00

As I embark today on a journey to Hawaii , it's a reminder that what I've taken for granted as home, is also one of the most popular wedding destinations in the world, with over 25,000 weddings taking place each year. May and June are the most popular months to get married. September and October follow and the average number of guests at a destination wedding in Hawaii is 47...yet I digress...

Often times it's a tricky concept just how to hire a photographer for a destination wedding. Do you hire the wedding site's photographer, do you fly someone in, do you hire someone local to the area, or do you just give Uncle Henry the ole point and shoot and crown him king for the day...

Once you have decided that photography is important enough to you to fly someone in, remember that the usual concept of photography being 10-15% of your budget should go right out the proverbial window. Destination weddings are usually smaller, however the photographer is not working just one day. He or she is traveling as well, so figure that the photographer is going to be considering this upon offering you his quote. Then, add on travel and accommodations for the photographer, transportation and per diem. This is where the brain can garner a hernia...

Even though your wedding may only have 40 people with a buffet reception, expect your photographer to request his fee for a full day of wedding services at their full day rate. Remember, this is for an established destination photographer. Of course there are ways to be economically conservative such as hiring an up and coming photographer who wishes to build their book and experience, and this can be wonderful as well. Just make sure they understand fully the logistics of flying with equipment. They should also be aware that usual equipment insurers do not cover internationally, and an extra policy will need to be secured.

On average, it costs a photographer around $2000 to fly to a wedding with three nights accommodations and lost work days at home. This includes taxi, food, but this is only if they do not bring an assistant. If they are bringing an assistant, it will cost them at least an extra $1500 for their travel, pay, and this is if they share the same room (this is why my hubby is my assistant much of the time ;0). This is a very rough estimate, but helps you wrap your mind around the logistics.

Of course these costs go up once you go international as this necessitates extra travel days and accommodations, etc.

Ask your photographer if they can compile an estimate specifically for your wedding location/destination which includes:

Air, transportation, accommodations at or near your wedding site, wedding day shooting fee, welcome dinner shooting fee, their assistant's air and rate for working the day of the wedding, as well as meals.

It's really important that your photographer fly out to your location at least 2 nights prior to your wedding. This is to ensure that they are able to scout the site location the day before the wedding! You want them comfortable with the surroundings, selecting portrait locales, they should visit the wedding location at the exact time the wedding is going to held so they are aware of the lighting. Coming in early also ensures your photographer has a cushion in case of flight cancellations or delays. So, essentially, you are looking at 3 nights hotel accommodations minimum.

Allow the photographer to make their own arrangements for travel, etc. out of the fee they are charging you. With everything on your plate, the last thing you want to be doing is worrying about where they want to fly out of, what time they want to fly, which hotel they want to stay at....Just give them the exact airport to fly in to, the hotel you and your guests are staying at and a less expensive option nearby, and the rest is gravy. With a solid destination photographer, they have done this many, many times before and is simply second nature to us.

Keep in mind that as complicated as some of this sounds, some of us simply love to travel, to bond with our clients over these experiences, and all the minute financial details are obliterated with one fell swoop of set destination packages.

Hawaii: boom! One price.

Europe: boom! Another price.

Mexico: boom! You get the picture...

Now, remember that when you have a destination wedding, it is not just a wedding anymore....it is an event which your family and friends have traveled, left work, and used their heart-earned dollars to join you, and this is their vacation too...!!!!! I get so excited when I visit a new place as well, even if I'm working, I'm like a kid at Christmas. Everyone is relaxed and happy, life is good. Ask your photographer if they can prepare a slide-show of 30-40 of the images that you could have within the week to email to your friends and family while the momentum is still kickin'. Everyone wants to relive those vacation moments as quickly as possible to share with their loved ones as soon as they get home, so keep this in mind and communicate with your photographer as to his/her abilities to fulfill not only your needs, but those of your guests as well; if your photographer has an online link from which your guests will order photos later, ask them if they can release the link to you early so you can send it to your guests prior to the wedding. With my online lab, Pictage, the client's guests can preregister, so they are notified as soon as the bride releases her link to the public. This way she doesn't have to worry about emailing everyone at once!

It's such an exciting time, and destination weddings are truly unique and special. With every destination I've done, it's felt as though camp just ended and it was time to leave Neverland...

How do I Choose My Photographer?

2010-01-26T10:46:00.000-08:00

You are finally ready to talk to photographers.....AH the joy of meeting someone new, who you hope can match their artwork on their site, who you pray won't steal your money and run off to the Bahamas....
All the stories about friends who's photographers didn't get their images to them for a year, or had their associate show up instead of themselves....FUN!

Truly, the experience doesn't need to be stressful, and these things happen less often than you think. However, there are ways to ensure that the enigma that is the wedding photographer is not necessarily a Trojan horse, but could possibly even turn out to be a lifelong friend.

First and foremost, decide how important photography truly is to you in the overall scheme of your day. How much of your budget should be alotted to photography? On average, 10-15% of your budget for your wedding day should be set aside for the customary photographer. Nowadays the average wedding runs around 28-30,000. So...consider that to hire an experienced photographer with a good reputation you should expect to pay around $2800-$3500.
This is usually for wedding coverage only or they may be including products with such a rate, this will vary.
One of the most important questions to ask are:

Does your rate include bridal preparation, putting on the dress?

Is this fee for a set number of hours? (My wedding day coverage is 12 hours, with an overtime fee above and beyond this. This is important to ask, as photographers are only human, and equipment, the camera bodies are heavy and physically we can only go full steam ahead for so long.)

Does this fee include a "High Resolution disc of Jpeg images"?

Are the images I receive color corrected?

How many of the images that I receive are fully mastered? (Some photographers on do levels and color correction without the artistic enhancements on their images. Some do levels and color correction on all of the edited images, but only Master 40-60 of their favorites.) DO make sure that the disc of images are not only edited (meaning they take out all the bad ones of Aunt Milly with her eyes shut, and Uncle Joe drunk in the corner) but that they are color corrected. This is industry standard. The alternative is practiced by low end photographers who "shoot and burn", meaning they shoot the wedding, and burn a disc.

Is there a list of their product and pricing before you book. Pricing changes from season to season sometimes as vendors change, lab fees go up, etc. so make sure you have documentation of the set pricing at the time of booking.

What is the photographer's rules regarding copyright? Is it ok to use your images on your engagments announcements, website, etc. without permission? Some are very flexible about this, others charge a fee per usage of the images, others simply request credit with the image(s). Always ask about this issue as for some it is a sensitive issue.

This is just the beginning, but hopefully this bit of information is helpful in your search for the perfect photographer. MOST importantly, if you love photography, if you are inspired by the person's art, an in-person meeting is just as important to ensure the proper chemistry is present between all of you. You are not only interviewing the photographer, the photographer is interviewing you ;0) Life is precious and short, and this is the most important day of your life, and a day of passion and efforts in the photographer's. The right photographer will "click" immediately. Ask yourself when you meet him/her, would I like this person as my friend? Could I see myself inviting them over for a BBQ? It seems silly, but it's true that chemistry is essential to a positive experience. The bond of loyalty and inspiration is birthed by the connection between all of you. The end result, a wedding day captured not only by a photographer you hired, but by a friend who truly cares about you, your day, your memories....

Shallan & Linus / Cancun 2010

2010-01-23T08:34:00.001-08:00

The wedding of Shallan & Linus...A story...

The Zen of Photography

2010-01-22T10:38:00.000-08:00

The ZEN of photography

In essence, the secret to your success has a lot to do with an ability that few of us think about when we first decide to get into photography; The ability to become one with the environment….. This is the Zen of photography.

That feeling that you are so in sync with the world around you that you could sense a misquito about to burp in the other room. It sounds funny, but it’s true.

A good photographer captures what’s happening around him. An awesome photographer becomes one with what’s around him, enters the middle realm of reality and grabs the shot from the inside out essentially grabbing the soul of the moment and holding it for ransom.

Ok, maybe not to that extreme, but think about the last “great” photograph you took. The one that when you first saw it, it spoke to you. It told you that you alone owned that moment in time. Then you thought it was kind of cool so you showed it to a friend and for a moment there was silence, you sat wondering if it was really good or not. Then they said it, “That’s really good…..wow, you know that could be in a magazine. You should enter that in a contest or something….” And for a moment all was right in the world. The economy could crash again and worlds could collide but for that moment nothing else existed or mattered. For that moment, you realized you created something special all your own, that no one else captured. In some ways photography is a selfish, lonely existence. The irony is that we make a living providing memories for others.

The art of photography comes in creating beautiful imagery, but does this come from shooting for the client or shooting for yourself?

A good photographer balances shooting for himself first and then for the client. I know, this goes against all logic and everything you’ve ever heard about wedding photography. Of course you must shoot for the client, but don’t forget the reason they hired you: They like your work, they like you, and most of all they trust you. Yes, a successful photographer must be mentally unbalanced to the point that you become 2 people at the same time. One part of you is shooting what FEELS right to you, it’s that sweet spot, that moment when you hit the tennis racket and the ball just pops off through the air and crosses the net perfectly. The other side of you wants to cross-dress, I mean must cross over the aisle to the perpetual aisle and shoot from the head, not the hip. Being able to capture both what you desire and what the client expects traditionally makes you a good photographer. Doing both of these things at once make you a great photographer.

Retreat...

2010-01-21T12:51:00.000-08:00

Middle Realm...

2010-01-21T12:48:00.001-08:00

2010-01-21T11:22:00.000-08:00

2010-01-21T11:19:00.000-08:00

2010-01-21T11:13:00.000-08:00

2010-01-21T11:09:00.000-08:00

2010-01-21T10:56:00.000-08:00

Just returned from shooting Shallan & Linus's wedding in Cancun; a mix of business and pleasure, I took don and the little ones with me!

Storms permeated our week, with clouds parting for the ceremony. Shallan & Linus ROCKED the beach shoot after the ceremony, weathering droplets and taunting storm clouds. The images captured offer a glimpse to the grumbling heavens, but allowed for an ambiance photographers can only dream of.

2008-08-22T09:09:00.000-07:00

Bensko Photojourneys for the Soul
bringing the world together one shot at a time...

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It's Official!
Tibet to Everest!
August 1 - 11 2009

Conquer the Great Wall
Venture through the Tibetan Countryside
Embrace the Ancient Dwelling of the Dalai Lamas
Chant with the Monks
Overnight at Everest

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Dear Friends,

I am officially launching my inaugural photo expedition Photojourney for the Soul, Tibet to Everest 2009, with the emphasis on cultural appreciation through immersion and imagery. A limited number of positions will be offered to individuals with a simple love for photography, as well as openness to embracing the intricacies of this multicultural and spiritual adventure.

Bensko Photography will contribute photographic support, with cultural guidance by Jim Hagan of Wisdom Tours who has personally created life-altering experiences for his clients in the region for over 30 years. This itinerary is built to emphasize the photographic and spiritual elements of the region culminating in the arrival at the most majestic place on the planet, the foot of Everest.

One week after this journey, a reunion will occur in Los Angeles where I will personally conduct a Photoshop and File Organizing Seminar, resulting in a personal Coffee Table Book for each individual with 100 of your favorite images from your Photojourney.

A portion of the proceeds from Tibet to Everest will benefit the SFK Foundation (Spirituality For Kids). SFK teaches kids tools for life to end the cycle of conflict for children at risk - emotionally, physically, and spiritually. It begins by teaching the tools that will help them realize their full potential and change the course for them and future generations. http://www.sfk.org

In our ever changing world, there is opportunity for growth and enlightenment of the cultures which enhabit our planet. For years I have appreciated mankind through the lens, it is time to do so through the soul.

Photojourney for the Soul is a way to bring people together through the love of imagery to discover the beauty in cultures beyond our own.
Tibet to Everest is a collaboration between Bensko Photography and guides with over thirty years experience in the region.

Photojourney for the Soul,

Live your dream along with mine...

Micaela

Itinerary

Tibet to Everest
August 1st-11th 2009

Day 1
Arrive in Beijing, transfer to hotel and meet up with the group. Overnight - Beijing

Day 2
Full day of exploring Beijing, the capital of the People's Republic of China. Beijing is a city with a history stretching back more than two thousand years. We explore some of the treasures of this magnificent city such as The Forbidden City and the Great Wall of China. Overnight Beijing

Day 3
Depart the colorful city of Beijing on a flight to Lhasa, the heart and soul of Tibet and once the centuries-old home of the Dalai Lamas. On our first day, we will browse Lhasa's ancient market and bazaar - the Barkhor, where we will see pilgrims from all over Tibet circumambulating Tibet's holiest temple, the Jokhang. Overnight Lhasa

Day 4
We begin our day of exploring Lhasa at the Potala - the Pure Land of Avalokitesvara - the embodiment of compassion and the former winter residence of the Dalai Lamas. Constructed in the 17th century by the great Fifth Dalai Lama, this fantastic masterpiece of Tibetan architecture has more than 1000 rooms that include a collection of sacred Buddhist art second to none. Centuries of sacred art - statues, stupas and paintings are contained in the many shrines, temples and prayer halls. The history of Tibet is portrayed here in the Potala, on its walls and altars in this magnificent former palace. In the afternoon, we visit Sera Monastery, north of Lhasa. This Gelugpa monastery was once the home to 5,000 monks. Founded in 1419, Sera has a superb collection of sacred art. The highlight of our visit to Sera is experiencing the monks perform their afternoon debates. In the evening we visit the Jokhang Temple, Tibet's holiest of temples. Here at the Jokhang, we will have the rare opportunity to sit and chant with the monks. Overnight Lhasa.

Day 5
Early morning departure for Shigatse. On the outskirts of Shigatse, we will visit Shalu Monastery, located a few miles east of Shigatse. This beautiful small monastery, with its Chinese style green tiled roofs, dates back to the 11th century. Shalu is noted for its 14th century murals that fuse Chinese, Mongol and Nepalese styles. Shalu is a treasure house of Buddhist art and is one of my most favorite sites in Tibet. Overnight Shigatse.

Day 6
Early morning departure for Mount Everest. We are treated to one of the most spectacular mountain drives in Tibet. Driving through small remote villages we come to one of the highest mountain passes that offers us our first magnificent view of the massive Himalayan range including Mount Everest. With our first glimpse we come to understand why the Tibetans refer to it as Chomolungma, the Mother Goddess of the World! Overnight - Everest

Day 7
In the morning we will explore the world's highest monastery - Rongphu Gompa. We then depart Everest and drive back through the Tibetan countryside to Shigatse. Overnight - Shigatse.

Day 8
After breakfast we visit Tashilhunpo Monastery, once the seat of the Panchen Lama, who was declared an incarnation of the Buddha Amitabha by the Fifth Dalai Lama. Tashilhunpo houses a brilliant collection of sacred Buddhist art especially with its 86 foot-high statue of the future Buddha Maitreya. After lunch, we return to Lhasa. Overnight - Lhasa.

Day 9
Our wonderful adventure of Tibet comes to its conclusion as we have our last look at the Tibetan countryside as we travel to Gongar Airport for our return flight to Beijing. Arrive in Beijing and transfer to hotel. Overnight Beijing.

Day 10
Full free day in Beijing to rest, shop and prepare for our next day return flight back to the States. Overnight Beijing.

Day 11
Homeward bound. We depart Beijing for the States.

One Week Later
A reunion will occur in Los Angeles where Bensko will conduct a Photoshop and File Organizing Seminar, resulting in a personal Coffee Table Book for each individual with 100 of your favorite images from your adventure of Tibet to Everest.

$6500 pp Includes rt airfare from LAX to Tibet, Transportation, Accommodations, Meals

Elope to Everest
Coming Soon~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If it is your dream to stand at the foot of Mount Everest, imagine beginning your lives together in that very spot. Beginning 2009 Bensko Photography is offering packages for weddings from 2-24 people at the foot Everest. Life is about stories, this will be one which will echo for generations to come.

Kindly Contact Bensko Photography for Details and Booking

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phone: 310.990.8389
email: benskophotography@gmail.com
201 South Santa Fe Ave. Suite 301, Los Angeles, CA 90012
www.benskophotography.com

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